O Jardineiro e a Lista da Morte

...it turns out the movie is a mess.

It tries to walk that line between comedy and action but the thing is it's never funny - not once. I mean it, it NEVER has a funny moment. And, as far as the action goes it's pretty geriatric and slowpaced. It's hard to write this but - the action is boring.

I gave it a 3/10 because of JCVD but...I mean...that's being generous.

...it turns out the movie is a mess.

It tries to walk that line between comedy and action but the thing is it's never funny - not once. I mean it, it NEVER has a funny moment. And, as far as the action goes it's pretty geriatric and slowpaced. It's hard to write this but - the action is boring.

I gave it a 3/10 because of JCVD but...I mean...that's being generous.

...it turns out the movie is a mess.

It tries to walk that line between comedy and action but the thing is it's never funny - not once. I mean it, it NEVER has a funny moment. And, as far as the action goes it's pretty geriatric and slowpaced. It's hard to write this but - the action is boring.

I gave it a 3/10 because of JCVD but...I mean...that's being generous.

STAR RATING: ***** Brilliant **** Very Good *** Okay ** Poor * Awful

Serge Shuster (Michael Youn) is a scatty-minded government minister, who finds himself on a government hit list, after a series of other officials are wiped out in quick succession. When a group of trained assassins invade his home, he is forced to defend himself and his family, with the help of Leo (Jean Claude Van Damme), the family gardener with a mysterious past, and a set of killing skills that come in handy.

In the words of the original martial arts action star Bruce Lee "it's better to be a warrior in a garden, than a gardener in a war." That philosophy is put to the test by fellow, 65 year old martial arts star Jean Claude Van Damme, with his role in this peculiar French effort from writer/director David Charhon. Although with that in mind, he's co starring with fellow continental actor Michael Youn, both clearly dubbed, with only a thin line between madcap and methodical.

An action comedy is a concept that still has potential to work in execution, but the inconsistency in tone here is noticeably bouncy and unstable, with the main story and central characters becoming caught in the crossfire of this imbalance. It doesn't help that it outstays its welcome somewhat, overlong and with only a fairly standard action plot to sustain it. Sad truths, given Van Damme, although older now, can still pull off some impressive fight work, and even gets one or two laughs in, and the action in general is still enjoyable, keeping you hooked till the end, surprisingly gory here and there too.

There's some noticeable send ups of various action classics, including The Equalizer, First Blood and such, some of which hit the mark more than others. This ultimately emerges as a bizarre fusion of styles, that is sadly too overstuffed with all of them. ** and a half.

Why are people giving money to the director David Charhon? Are they suffering from dementia? Have they seen his filmography? This man can't write, can't direct actors or crew, and can't edit. The Gardener manages to be worse than The Last Mercenary (which is already horrible), so congratulations! The cast? A botoxed K1 fighter, three terrible influencers, a rapper... There are fewer real actors in this film than influencers. Isn't that a problem? The direction of these people: zero. Van Damme looks like he's in distress every time he opens his mouth. Either he's unmanageable (in which case, just leave him alone), or someone didn't know how to direct him. Let's stop the carnage. Let's stop funding David Charhon.

I don't know what happened in the commenters life, that didn't find this movie any fun or anything of the sorts, but if you can find a discount on humor, i suggest you buy it!!!

JCVD Is to most probably known as an action star, martial artist, but he has made comedy before, and to me, this movie was a sign of that combination, that JCVD still has, he is still in shape, and he can be funny, what's not to like!?

If you're a JCVD fan, then this is definitely one that should entertain you, it has some nice action scenes, lots of violence, some comedy, i really found the references to Rambo quite fun, subtle references, but if you've watched the latest Rambo, you'll easily spot it :)

I'm gonna have to give this a 7 / 10, because i found it pretty entertaining, a little slow start, but then it's quite smooth after that and throughout :)

Was really looking forward to seeing JCVD again, sadly this isn't kickboxer or Universal soldier. It isn't even remotely close.

From the opening scene the bad guys with their balaclavas and Assault rifles, really scary looking apart from the fact they didn't have magazines in.

The guy trying to evade never got above grandad jog speed before meeting his demise.

I lost interest after that. However being a fan of JCVD I continue to watch thinking it's got to get better. Sadly it didn't. It's classed as a comedy but I didn't find any of it funny or amusing.

Now I need to make up the minimum a.....