Not much to write home about, there are at least enough distinctive flourishes in early storefront grinder ILLEGAL ENTRY to make it of passing interest. It's basically assembly-line porn, but possesses a few oddball elements that will stick with you.

Despite the roughie-sounding title, ENTRY isn't really about much a hostage scenario, just standard breaking-and-entering. Film opens with a trio of 20-something male robbers (among whom I could only identify early XXX day player Gene Rowland) breaking into a residence to loot it. In an amusing touch, aside from the opening title, rendered via cheap schoolhouse ABCs pasted on Plexiglas to crudely simulate an optical, the rest of the credits are revealed as names pasted to cabinet interiors as the guys rifle through the house, a mark of the kind of spendthrift ingenuity that sometimes pops up in these early cheapo efforts.

Trio is rudely interrupted by the arrival of two women, who rent the house with their boyfriends. Highlight here is early XXX breakout Judy Angel, probably most famous for playing porn's first MILF in Howard Ziehm and Michael Beneviste's breakout hit MONA, but also familiar to lower-end porn hounds from myriad storefront grinders. With their hubbies - a couple vice cops - on the beat, the girls decide to occupy themselves, cueing a lesbian scene that takes place shockingly late into the film (at least 10 minutes!). Needing to pad out the runtime further, the movie next joins the spouses, in flagrante with a couple hookers. This adds nothing to the story except to make them *less* sympathetic, but logic often goes out the window when trying to fill an hour's worth of screen time in a single-day shoot.

The film's basically over before it's begun (around 40 minutes in) by the time the trio of burglars reveals itself, surprising the sapphic duo by presenting their cocks as centerpieces on crudely assembled cheese-'n'-cracker plates thrown together in the kitchen. True to the genre, the girls are delighted rather than scared by the appearance of the interlopers, and the rest of the runtime is filled with more sex, before a highly predictable surprise ending.

Similar premises has been treated just as dully (albeit more satisfyingly structured) in other storefront flicks like THE FUGITIVES (and its hardcore cousin, THE GIRL-NAPPERS), REVENGE, etc.: criminals break into a home, hold everyone hostage, and sex ensues. The problem here is that any frisson of danger is totally removed from the equation, and all we're left with is by-the-numbers rutting, which takes a surprisingly long time to get onscreen (suggesting this was perhaps a very early XXX effort that felt the need to better legitimize itself with more "story"). Weirdest touch is making one of the three burglars - actually a fairly attractive guy - mentally handicapped. He spends the entire film doing oddball things like playing with the women's dildos (even sucking one at one point!) or standing in the corner masturbating during the orgy rather than getting involved. Given the guy looks ready enough for primetime, it's a strange decision, and leads one to wonder whether the guy was gay, got on the director's nerves, or just didn't want to go all the way on camera! Despite the movie's peculiar desire to force this one poor dude to make a idiot out of himself, however, this is otherwise fairly perfunctory porn, mainly notable for featuring a couple early familiar faces - Judy and Gene - and for its unfortunate squandering of the latter.