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Keegan-Michael Key, Jordan Peele, and Lyric Ross in Wendell & Wild (2022)

Quotes

Wendell & Wild

Edit
  • Kat: I said they were demons, Raul! My personal demons! And they lied!
  • Raul: Maybe demons aren't the most trustworthy creatures to make deals with.
  • Father Bests: Children, life is precious. Right now, you're wasting mine.
  • Irmgard Klaxon: You're supposed to be dead!
  • Lane Klaxon: You look bloody hideous!
  • Father Bests: I like my new look.
  • Wendell: Now, we're stuck here for life!
  • Wild: Guess we got what we deserved.
  • Wendell: We? You have not begun to get what you deserve.
  • Wendell: We can't raise the dead.
  • Wild: Well, we do know how to lie.
  • Wendell: Oh! I like that plan.
  • Siobhan: You make a pile of money for every prisoner you take. So you pack them in like sardines, provide crap food, crap medical, dangerous conditions, and zero rehabilitation.
  • Lane Klaxon: [pats Siobhan on the head] I am proud of you, dear.
  • Irmgard Klaxon: That's our business model, exactly.
  • Wendell: [to Wild] Do it again.
  • [Wild crushes a tick and brings it back to life with creamy foam]
  • Wendell: [reacting] Whoa!
  • Wild: [to Wendell] See, Wendell?
  • Kat: [enters carrying Cyclops. She sits down in her chair, slams the Cyclops onto her desk, and presses the "Stop" button]
  • [to Raul; recognizing him]
  • Kat: Huh? You're the assassin.
  • Raul: [taking composition journal off head; to Kat] No, that brick was loose.
  • Kat: Eyes ahead. You're drawing attention.
  • Raul: [re: Siobhan] Thank God you saved her.
  • Kat: I didn't. She got lucky.
  • Raul: She uh... We used to be friends.
  • Kat: You liked that prized poodle?
  • Raul: Yeah.
  • Kat: Why were you up that tower?
  • Raul: It's an art project for when the snow melts.
  • [offering a handshake]
  • Raul: I'm Raúl.
  • Kat: I don't do friends, Raúl. Bad things happen to people I'm close to.
  • Raul: Like what?
  • Kat: [sighs; then whispers] They die.
  • Kat: I don't do friends, Raul. Bad things happen to people I'm close to.
  • Raul: Like what?
  • Kat: They die.
  • Father Bests: [after being resurrected by Wendell and Wild] DEAR GOD! I'M IN HELL!
  • Wild: No way, padre.
  • Wendell: You're back in good ol' Rustbank, fully alive.
  • Female Cop: Lane and Irmgard Klaxon, you're under arrest for arson and homicide.
  • Lane Klaxon: [as Lane and Irmgard are handcuffed and dragged by the police] What? That's preposterous!
  • Irmgard Klaxon: Can't prove a bloody thing without witnesses!
  • Marianna Cocolotl: [Marianna shows up with three resurrected brewery workers] Officers, your witnesses.
  • Lane Klaxon: Wait, wait! It was all *her* doing! My wife's the murderer, not me
  • Irmgard Klaxon: How dare you, Lane?
  • [starts strangling Lane with her handcuffs]

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