- Guy: I know this world is just a game, but this place, these people, that's all I have. So I'm not gonna be the good guy. I'm gonna be a great guy.
- Molotov Girl: [inhales] Wow, enjoy your lifetime supply of virginity.
- [being told Guy is a non-playable character]
- Antoine: I don't care if he's Arnold Schwarz-invader! Terminate him!
- [talking to Guy at his lowest]
- Buddy: Hey, I'm here with my best friend, trying to help him through a tough time. If that ain't real, I don't know what is.
- Guy: I love you, Millie. Now maybe that's just my programming talking, but guess what? Somebody wrote that program. I'm just a love letter to you. Somewhere out there is the author.
- Molotov Girl: [straddles Guy on a motorcycle during a shootout] Is that a Glock in your pocket?
- Guy: [from trailer] No...
- Molotov Girl: What?
- Guy: It's TWO Glocks!
- [Guy touches a health icon and it surges through his body, healing all injuries]
- Guy: Is this what recreational drugs feel like?
- Guy: Millie, how many times a day are the banks robbed in your world?
- Molotov Girl: Hardly ever, Guy.
- Guy: What about corpses, Mille? Do ya see a lot of those? How many an hour?
- Molotov Girl: None per hour, Guy.
- Guy: What about gun violence? See a lot of gun violence in your world?
- Molotov Girl: Actually, that's a big problem, Guy, it's a massive problem
- Mouser: Lose the skin!
- Guy: Lose...? Wha..? How am I supposed to get rid of my skin?
- Mouser: Take it off, man. Just take it off. What are you doing?
- Guy: What?
- Keys: Seriously.
- Mouser: The whole thing: the face, the outfit, everything.
- Guy: How?
- Mouser: Ditch it! If you don't, we're gonna kill you.
- Guy: Why?
- Keys: And we're gonna KEEP killing you.
- Guy: Still why?
- Mouser: Until we do find out who you are, and then we're going to ban you for life!
- Guy: Okay. I WANT to comply. I just find the order of those threats very confusing.
- [Molotov Girl is walking through Free City, quoting the NPC's lines along with them, then hums "Fantasy" by Mariah Carey to herself; Guy sees this and is entranced by her]
- Molotov Girl: [quoting Guy] Don't have a good day, have a great day.
- Guy: I love that song.
- [She stops, turns around and eyes him suspiciously]
- Molotov Girl: That's a new one.
- Revenjamin Buttons: Mom! Do not touch that sock! I swear to God if you touch that sock you will be in therapy for the rest of your life! No! It's my special sock! Put it down!
- Guy: Okay. Wait! How will I know that I've levelled up enough?
- Molotov Girl: Uh, get over 100, then we'll talk.
- Guy: Whoa.
- Molotov Girl: Bye now.
- Guy: That's so much more than one. Like, 99 more.
- Molotov Girl: Bye now.
- Guy: Okay.
- Molotov Girl: If you ever met the dick responsible for this world, you'd agree.
- Guy: Are we talking about God? You've met God? And he's a dick?
- [In the midst of fighting an enemy, Guy accidentally breaks the guy's arm at the joint]
- Guy: [genuinely freaked out] Oh, my God! I am so, so sorry!
- Molotov Girl: So, what are you gonna to do
- Guy: Anything I want. Thanks to you, I'm not stuck in a loop anymore and neither are you. I love you Milie. Maybe that's my programming talking, but guess what, someone wrote that program, I'm just a love letter to you. Somewhere out there is the author
- [Millie begins to realize and plays a video clip from Keys]
- Keys: You brought him to life, You brought him to life and he was alive because he met the one person he's been waiting for his whole life and I had to make it realistic, so I based it off of "you". The woman of his dreams, she was the same as mine.So she like bubble gum ice cream and swing sets and she had this very cute, but oddly specific habit of always humming to this classic Mariah Carey track, like all the time, she would repeat
- [she gets up and tries to find Keys]
- Mouser: [happily to see Millie] Finally
- Alex Trebek: This colorful character from in videogame Free City has been turning heads by being the good guy.
- Contestant: Who is Blue Shirt Guy?
- Keys: Code: It's not just zeros and ones, it's hidden messages. I like to think of myself actually as not a code writer, but an author. I just use zeros and ones instead of words.
- Mouser: Lose the skin!
- Guy: I... Lose the... How am I supposed to get rid of my skin?
- Mouser: Take it off, man. Just take it off, what are you doing?
- Guy: What?
- Keys: Seriously.
- Mouser: The whole thing, man: the face, the outfit, everything.
- Guy: How?
- Mouser: Ditch it. If you don't we're going to kill you...
- Guy: Why?
- Keys: And we're going to keep killing you... .
- Guy: Still why?
- Mouser: ...Until we do find out who you are, and then we're going to ban you for life!
- Guy: Okay, no, no, okay, I want to comply. I just find the order of those threats very confusing.
- Bank Manager: [repeated line whenever the bank is being robbed] Nobody try to be a hero. This will all be over soon.
- Guy: This is Free City. Look at this guy. He's one of the sunglasses people. And the people who wear sunglasses are heroes. They have a devil-may-care attitude and they run this town.
- Bombshell: You are so hot.
- Revenjamin Buttons: Oh, I know.
- Guy: See? That's not even his car. Or his wife. For the sunglasses people, they get to do anything they want. They go on all sorts of missions. They got cool hair, cool clothes. I mean, laws aren't really laws to them. They're more like mild suggestions. Like, I don't think he's gonna return that car. Or that nice lady. See what I mean?
- Buddy: I'm me, who I am right now, and I'm just trying to help a friend. I say, okay, so what if I'm not real?
- Guy: I'm sorry. "So what?"
- Buddy: Yeah. So what?
- Guy: But if you're not real, doesn't that mean that nothing you do matters? What does that mean?
- Buddy: I mean, what's more real than a person trying to help someone they love? Now, if that's not real, I don't know what is.
- Bombshell: [upon Revenjamin Buttons landing in the blue car that she is in] You are so hot!
- Revenjamin Buttons: Oh, I know!