- Screenwriter: [Harry Potter] Voldemort couldn't kill him because He was saved by love? Hadn't anyone sacrificed themselves for love before this?
- Screenwriter: I guess not.
- Screenwriter: What a loveless World.
- Screenwriter: Thanks for watching that Pitch Meeting for the Academy Award Nominated "The Boss Baby". What is Life...?
- Screenwriter: The Sunk Cost Fallacy?
- Screenwriter: It's something I read about: the more time someone invests in something, the harder a time they have quitting that thing.
- Screenwriter: It'll be funny because Sausages don't normally swear.
- Movie Executive: Sausages don't normally do anything.
- Screenwriter: And what she has to save him from is the Whomping Willow.
- Movie Executive: Isn't that that Willow that Whomps?
- Screenwriter: It is, Sir!
- Screenwriter: If someone's not useful to me anymore, why would I keep them alive?
- Screenwriter: You're talking about Screenwriting right now, aren't you?
- Screenwriter: Wouldn't you like to know!
- Screenwriter: Security!
- Screenwriter: So then the engine starts to leak, so there's an explosion.
- Movie Executive: What sparks the explosion?
- Screenwriter: Just Life.
- Movie Executive: That'll get ya.
- Screenwriter: We're going to be making these movies until we're dead.
- Screenwriter: I already feel dead on the inside.
- Screenwriter: I forget what it feels like to have a soul.
- Screenwriter: A what?
- Screenwriter: And if we get stuck storywise we throw in a twist where one of them was evil the whole time, or we solve the problem with their Magic Mask Machine.
- Screenwriter: They have a Magic Mask Machine?
- Screenwriter: Yeah, yeah, yeah! It's this thing that makes a perfect mask of someone's face. And changes your teeth and height and weight and maneurisms and everything about you.
- Screenwriter: Oh, that does sound borderline magical.
- Screenwriter: Yeah, so they're all basically Mystique from X-men.
- Screenwriter: Sometimes I wander into the suburbs and end up Tranquilised.
- Screenwriter: Please stop telling me how similar to a bear you are.
- Screenwriter: Aren't you tired of Naked Butts Dictating everything you do?
- Screenwriter: I think you're the only one struggling with that!
- Screenwriter: Wait, an Assassin hired an Assassin?
- Screenwriter: Yeah, an Assassin hired an Assassin and then followed the Assassin to supervize the Assassination and then Assassinated the Assassin when the Assassination went wrong.
- Screenwriter: Oh, okay, I'm pretty sure that doesn't make sense but you said the word Assassin so much that I'm all thrown off and I'm just going to go with it.
- Screenwriter: I don't want to toot my own horn or anything, but Shakespeare can suck it, I'm the greatest writer now!
- Screenwriter: Oh, Dethroning Shakespeare is tight!
- Screenwriter: I have to say, it feels like a lot of the main characters are getting sidelined.
- Screenwriter: Well, you asked me to shove 75 main characters into a single movie, you sick bastard!
- Screenwriter: I did do that.
- Screenwriter: I haven't slept since 2015 and I hate you so much.
- Movie Executive: Turds in the Wind are tight!
- Screenwriter: How do you already have an opinion about Turds in the Wind?
- Movie Executive: My Cat's Litter Box is next to a Fan.
- Screenwriter: What awful things happened to you as a kid?
- Screenwriter: You couldn't possibly imagine, Sir!
- Screenwriter: No, it's going to be Super Easy, barely an Inconvenience!
- Screenwriter: Hey, I say that!
- Screenwriter: Huh?
- Screenwriter: I've never heard you say that!
- Screenwriter: I think we need to recast the Character.
- Screenwriter: You don't think Pierce Brosnan is gritty?
- Screenwriter: I think he looks like a comfortable turtleneck came to life!
- Screenwriter: He does look like he gives great hugs!
- Screenwriter: Eyeballs that bleed for no reason are tight!
- Screenwriter: Have you encountered those before?
- Screenwriter: Yes.