I had to pause this movie with about 12 minutes left til the end, and I honestly didn't think I could finish it. I purposely combed through the closing credits to see if there was an editor, because I didn't believe there was one. Surprise, surprise, writer/director Ron Bonk also edited his own movie. I would say, only he would leave in all the unnecessary dialogue, subplots that go nowhere, dead air, abandoned characters, and utter nonsense. House Shark runs nearly 2 hours! Is there a good movie in here somewhere? Probably not. I'm giving it 4 stars because on a few occasions, I either laughed out loud or said "that was pretty good." 3 laughs in 2 hours? It starts off promisingly enough, with full-frontal nudity and an outrageously gory shark attack. As a matter of fact, after a certain amount of time, I thought this movie hired exclusively slutty actresses. No way, the bulk of this film gives way to a sausage fest.
I understand this filmmaker wanted to populate his movie with OTT characters, to be as campy as possible. Problem is, they're *SO* OTT, I couldn't understand them half the time! My expectations were certainly dashed. From the title, the concept, the zero-budget creative nature, the exploitative nature, the indie nature, the front and back cover, and what you would normally expect from a film like this. So, it's possible I'm being unfair. But it did not deliver on any of those levels.