- Snap: We got to find ourselves a new racket. Could we promote a Dance Marathon maybe? Dancing Lessons by Mail? How about a Bunion Derby? Bathing Beauty Contest? Pretty Baby Parade? Snail - Boss, I got the idea.
- Sherwood Nash: Look, Snap, will you do me a favor?
- Snap: Certainly, anything boss.
- Sherwood Nash: Just let me alone for a few minutes. I'll think of something.
- Glenda: You kinda like her, don't you?
- Sherwood Nash: I always admire efficiency.
- Glenda: Efficiency? I never heard it called that before!
- Sherwood Nash: Say, what's the matter? Isn't she running this all right?
- Glenda: She's running you all right. But, not me.
- Glenda: They've caught up with your racket, Mr. Mastermind. Well, I'm not much fun with policemen. So, I'm off to Buffalo. Toot-toot!
- [exits]
- Sherwood Nash: Well, haven't you better toot-toot, too?
- Lynn Mason: Nope.
- Sherwood Nash: You should, you know.
- Lynn Mason: Probably.
- Snap: Hey, ain't I in on this party?
- Sherwood Nash: Now, what could you do in Paris?
- Snap: Ha-ha-ha! What wouldn't I do in Paris!
- Sherwood Nash: [to Lynn] We could take him along as chaperone. You'll probably want one.
- Lynn Mason: Well, I don't want one. But, maybe, I'll need one.
- Snap: Ho-ho! Paris! Wine and women! Ha!
- Sherwood Nash: Well, believe it or not, we made it! I think I'll get on speaking terms with the stateroom.
- Snap: I think I'll get on speaking terms with the bar!
- Lynn Mason: Well, I'll go and see you don't talk it to death.
- Sherwood Nash: Glenda, Paris is one of the largest city's in the world; but, it's much too small to hold you and me both.
- Glenda: You can go to Timbuktu for all I care, as long as I get my cut.
- Sherwood Nash: Cut? Why what's the idea?
- Glenda: Oh, just a little dash of that efficiency you admire so much. Come on, baby, give!
- Ostrich Feather Customer at Maison Elegance: Oh, they're beautiful. Tell me, does it hurt the ostrich when they're plucked?
- Sherwood Nash: Madame, our patented plucking process is practically painless.
- Lynn Mason: Better keep working on the old girl in black.
- Sherwood Nash: She's a pretty tough bird.
- Lynn Mason: Turn on your charm, Sherwood. No woman can resist you.
- Sherwood Nash: Your resistance is still pretty good.
- Snap: What I could do to a nice juicy hamburger.
- Lynn Mason: One can think better on an empty stomach.
- Snap: Yeah, well, I'll be able to do some elegant thinkin' right now.
- Sherwood Nash: But, this number, Your Highness, shall simply knock your eye out!
- [spanks Mabel, impersonating a Russian Duchess, in the behind]
- Mabel McGuire aka The Duchess: How dare you!
- Sherwood Nash: Come on, now, Mabel. Be yourself!
- [grabs and kisses Mabel]
- Sherwood Nash: Well, well, well. How are things back in Hoboken?
- Mabel McGuire aka The Duchess: I thought I was getting away with it.
- Sherwood Nash: [looking at Mabel's hair] Well, I must admit the peroxide had me fooled for a little bit. But, Mabel,
- [looks at and pats Mabel's behind]
- Sherwood Nash: I never forget a personality.
- Mabel McGuire aka The Duchess: No kidding, Sherry, I didn't think you'd remember me.
- Sherwood Nash: No?
- Mabel McGuire aka The Duchess: Gee, it must be all of five or six years ago.
- Sherwood Nash: It was eleven, to be exact.
- Mabel McGuire aka The Duchess: Don't be vulgar. Eleven years ago I was still in finishing school.
- Sherwood Nash: And I was a Boy Scout.
- Mabel McGuire aka The Duchess: Oh, yeah? Well, what good deed might you be doing in Paris?
- Snap: We're in the bag! We're in the bag!
- Lynn Mason: And who will be left holding it?
- Snap: What's the matter, honey?
- Lynn Mason: Oh, I do wish he'd stick to one racket at a time.
- Snap: Or, one girl, huh?
- Sherwood Nash: [sarcastically] Too bad you don't get along better with our young, American composer.
- Lynn Mason: Oh, Jimmy's a darling. Don't you like him?
- Sherwood Nash: Well, my passion for him is well under control.
- Mabel McGuire aka The Duchess: Say, what is this Lynn girl to you anyway?
- Sherwood Nash: Now, don't you start. I'm having enough trouble explaining you to her!
- Jimmy: You're still carrying a torch for that Nash, aren't you? Listen, Lynn, I'm crazy about you! Why don't you forget that worthless...
- Lynn Mason: No account!
- Jimmy: Double-crossing!
- Lynn Mason: Lying!
- Jimmy: Two-timing!
- Lynn Mason: Chiseling!
- Jimmy: Unscrupulous!
- Lynn Mason: Unfaithful!
- Jimmy: Son of a...
- Lynn Mason: So-and-so! It's no use, Jimmy! He can top every adjective you can give me.
- Jimmy: I see, it's a case of
- [singing]
- Jimmy: Oh, my man, I love him so, he'll never know...
- Lynn Mason: Oh, stop!
- [exits]
- Sherwood Nash: Oh! Baby, baby! Just in time to congratulate you.
- Mabel McGuire aka The Duchess: No kidding, Sherry, how was I? Do they like me?
- Sherwood Nash: Like you? Listen to them! Say, if you're half as good in the second act as you were in the first, well, Duchess, they'll make you a Queen!
- Mabel McGuire aka The Duchess: [singing] Play your broken melody, Upon the strings of fantasy, Forget about your rainbow schemes, Spin a little web of dreams...
- Sherwood Nash: Ladies and gentlemen, I've always been told that when good Americans die, they don't go to heaven, they go to Paris. Smart Americans don't wait until they die. They don't want to take any chances.
- Customer at Maison Elegance: Mr. Nash, tell me, I'm so interested. Do you supervise all the details of this, even to the page girls costumes?
- Sherwood Nash: Oh, yes! I take care of everything, from the bottom up.
- Bridal Customer at Maison Elegance: I want you to do my entire trousseau: bridal gown, going away dress, lingerie. You handle lingerie, don't you?
- Sherwood Nash: Oh, yes! I take care of that personally.
- Happy Customer at Maison Elegance: You serve the most delicious caviar.
- Sherwood Nash: Yes, it comes from contented sturgeon.
- Impatient Customer at Maison Elegance: This is all very beautiful; but, where are the dresses?
- Sherwood Nash: Ah, Madame, have patience. My creations are like jewels, they require the proper setting.
- Doorman at Maison Elegance: Monsieur, Monsieur; Madame has just arrived!
- Lynn Mason: Do you really want me to go away with him?
- Sherwood Nash: No, baby, I don't. But, he'd probably make you much happier than I would.
- Sherwood Nash: Oh, why, baby, your little finger
- [kisses it]
- Sherwood Nash: means more to me than all the Mabel McGuires or Grand Duchesses in the whole of Europe.
- Lynn Mason: But, you made love to her.
- Sherwood Nash: Well, maybe I did. I had to kid her along. But, on the level, honey, she doesn't mean a thing to me.
- Lynn Mason: Well, I think you're lying; but, you do it so beautifully.
- Inventor on Ship: Mr. Nash, I have the most wonderful proposition for you. For years I've experimented and at last I've succeeded. I have succeeded in crossing silkworms with glowworms to make luminous evening dresses.
- Sherwood Nash: Well, say, that's an idea.
- Inventor on Ship: Why, Mr. Nash, we can make all fabrics glow like so many neon lights. And you are the only man in the world, Mr. Nash, who can put over this marvelous discovery. Think of the possibilities, Mr. Nash! Women's dresses glowing. Scintillating. Indoors. Outdoors. Picnics. Parties. Balls! We don't have to stop at dresses.
- Sherwood Nash: That's right. We could make lingerie! Pajamas. Night dresses.
- Inventor on Ship: Of course! Are you a married man, Mr. Nash? Wouldn't you like to see your wife glowing in the darkness?
- Oscar Baroque: You cannot bluff me. I'm not about to be taken in. I am the king of fashion.
- Sherwood Nash: Well, for your information, Oscar, a king can always be taken by an ace.
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