- Con Man: That horse of mine lost again. I'm gonna sell the dog. He's all run out.
- Con Man: Only a sucker would buy Thunderbolt.
- Con Man: Well, there's one born every minute.
- Larry: [nearby, looking a the newspaper] Look at this. "Madcap wins $10,000 sweepstakes."
- Moe: So what?
- Larry: $10,000 for just winning a race? That's the kind of game we oughta be in.
- Moe: You said it. If we could find a sucker who'd buy this place, we could get us a horse.
- Con Man: I got an idea.
- Customer ordering Veal: Hey, waiter. What is this, pork or veal?
- Moe: What'd you order?
- Customer ordering Veal: Veal.
- Moe: Then it's veal.
- Cafe Customer: Say, waiter, what's this dog growling at me for?
- Moe: Oh, don't mind him. He's mad 'cause you're eating out of his plate.
- Larry: How'd you enjoy your meal?
- Cafe Customer: The soup was watery, the steak was tough, and the coffee was just like mud.
- Larry: Well, I'm glad you liked it.
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