- Lodge secretary: At da las' meetin' which was for da purpose of COLLECTIN' DA LODGE DUES, der was NOBODY PRESENT! Dat, gen'lemen, was da minutes of da last meetin'.
- Amos: [on the phone with his girlfriend] Hello, Ruby - - dis here is Amos.
- Andy: Da guy wid da EGG-SHAPED HEAD.
- Amos: [absent-mindedly repeating what Andy just said] Da guy wid da egg-shaped head - - I mean, I mean - - sorry, Ruby... hold da phone a sec. Andy, will you please leeme 'lone? You is getting me messed up. Sorry 'bout that, hunny - - Andy got me messed up dere... Oh, yeah, Ruby... I LIKES to dance wid YOU -...
- Andy: [in a casual monotone] Da gal wid da BIG FEET.
- Amos: [again unconsciously repeating what Andy just said] The gal wid da big feet - - I mean, I mean - - sorry about dat, Ruby... Andy got me messed up that time. Anyway, I would love to go dancing with you. Well listen, Ruby -...
- Andy: [again interjecting a deadpan comment] Will you shut up?
- Amos: [again mindlessly parroting Andy's remark] Will you shut up? I mean, I mean - - oh-waaah... oh-waaaah... oh-waaah. Hold on a second, Ruby. Andy, will you PLEASE let me alone? Sorry, hunny... Andy got me messed up again. Well, listen, Ruby -...
- Andy: [in a snide mumble] You big fat head
- Amos: You big fat head. I mean, oh- wauhh, oh-wauhh, oh-wauhh. Hold on a sec, hunny. Andy... will you pleeeeeeeease leeme 'lone? All you is doing is gettin' me all muh-muh-mih-muh-miggs-mixed up!
- Andy: Well, okay, but remember that that is a BUSINESS TELEPHONE.
- Amos: Oh, I know that, but you don't need to holler at me ALL da time - -!
- [speaking back into the phone again]
- Amos: Sorry about that, hunny... I just got messed up again. Hello Andy; shut up, Ruby - - I mean... ohh-WAAAAAHH... oh-WAAAAAHHHH... oh-WAAAAAAAAHHH...
- Andy: [smirks]
- Amos: I mean, hello, Ruby... sorry about all that; Andy got me messed up again. Well, anyway, yeah, I really will look forward to seeing you at that dance tonight.