Frank Morgan credited as playing...
J.J. Ferris
- J.J. Ferris: If the poor can get any satisfaction out of being proud, well, why not? It costs nothing.
- J.J. Ferris: Leave it with me and rest assured I will handle it with all the tact and delicacy of a crooked diplomat.
- Casanova Brown: I think you got exactly what you deserved for being a shameless, unmitigated scoundrel.
- J.J. Ferris: I suppose so. But it was a bitter disappointment just the same.
- J.J. Ferris: [inside the Church] Where's the sucker?
- Mrs. Ferris: Oh, John! I do wish you wouldn't refer to him in that way! Supposing someone heard. What would they think?
- J.J. Ferris: [unfazed] Where's the sucker?
- Casanova Brown: [dreamily] Her eyes were like burned, charred embers in a field of snow.
- J.J. Ferris: Big face, eh?
- J.J. Ferris: [discussing his wife] I used to dream of outliving her. Just sit it out, as it were. But along came Madge. And then her sister. And now that odious child.
- J.J. Ferris: [after blithly telling his daughter the groom isn't coming] What do you all say we catch a movie tonight?
- Mr. Drury: Is this the same fellow that was marrying all the rest of them?
- J.J. Ferris: He's in a nuptial rut.
- J.J. Ferris: What was she like?
- Casanova Brown: Have you ever seen the sun come up at dawn?
- J.J. Ferris: I have. It nauseated me.
- J.J. Ferris: The shape of things to come, my boy.
- Casanova Brown: Oh, rot. Where else could you get $25 a week just by sitting around developing stomach ulcers?
- [$450 in 2025]
- J.J. Ferris: [Reading the maternity hospital letter to Casanova] They've got a nerve. Soliciting a man's business before he's even married. Sounds unethical to me.
- J.J. Ferris: Hey, you still got time to crash out of this booby-trap, you know. There's a fast train leaving out of here for Chicago, one o'clock. You can be across the border and into Canada.
- J.J. Ferris: [Reading the letter to Casanova out loud] ..a matter of personal importance, and one which I would rather not be obliged to take up in correspondence...
- [putting the letter down]
- J.J. Ferris: I, uh, I was involved in a little blackmail accident at one time - letter sounded exactly like this.
- J.J. Ferris: If you don't mind my saying so, Cas, I don't seem to have anything to keep my mouth shut on.
- J.J. Ferris: [Showing up for the wedding rehearsal] Where's the sucker?
- Mrs. Ferris: Oh, John, I do wish you wouldn't refer to him in that way. Supposing someone heard. What would they think?
- J.J. Ferris: Where's the sucker?
- J.J. Ferris: Suppose somebody asked you if you were out of your head? How would you feel? And how would you prove you weren't?
- J.J. Ferris: Under a democracy, Mrs. Smith, every individual enjoys the right and privilege of being as much of an imbecile as he pleases.