Dick Van Dyke credited as playing...
Edgar Hopper
- Leonard 'Lennie' Crawley: What are you, an orthodox coward?
- Edgar Hopper: No, Lennie. I just believe in passive resistance.
- Leonard 'Lennie' Crawley: Oh, a Mahatma Hopper, I presume?
- Edgar Hopper: No, as a matter of fact, Gandhi and I both got it from this guy--Henry Thoreau.
- Edgar Hopper: [Speaking through a megaphone] Folks, don't crawl to Crawley. Hop, hop, hop to Hoppers.
- Louisa May Foster: [Having swum out to Edgar in his fishing boat] Imagine finding you here. I just happened to be swimming by.
- Edgar Hopper: Well, you scared the fish away.
- Louisa May Foster: You could pull me in.
- Edgar Hopper: Oh, Louisa. I'll make you happy. I'll never work hard. I'll never make good, I swear it.
- Louisa May Foster: What's the matter, darling?
- Edgar Hopper: Oh, nothing. I, I think I'll go down to the store for a little while this afternoon.
- Louisa May Foster: But you were there just 10 days ago.
- Edgar Hopper: You know, it's the end of summer. People come from vacation. Somebody might want something.
- Louisa May Foster: Darling, I checked the hotels in Rome and I have the reservations for our vacation.
- Edgar Hopper: I'm sorry, honey, that'll have to wait 'til next year.
- Louisa May Foster: Next year?
- Edgar Hopper: Yes, next year. In the meantime, get yourself a couple of art books and a box of spaghetti.
- Edgar Hopper: [Gesturing from his simple cabin to the town] Louisa, you mean you'd take this instead of all that? But, Louisa, I've got nothing. I'll... I'll always have nothing. I'll always be nothing.
- Louisa May Foster: Edgar, that's what I want: nothing. To quote me and not Thoreau, I love you.
- Edgar Hopper: What's that camera for?
- Leonard 'Lennie' Crawley: I'm doing a documentary on slum conditions in Crawleyville.
- Louisa May Foster: Edgar, it's Christmas.
- Edgar Hopper: Yes, and Christmas is business--big business.
- Edgar Hopper: [Reading out loud as he types on a typewriter] Our musical mop, which plays "Let Me Call You Sweetheart, I'm in Love with you," is a marketing failure. Get something happy like "Stars and Stripes Forever" to guarantee musical mop-up.