- Opening Narration: Into a lawless land, they brought their own style of justice. Five men, one mission: The Chamber of Commerce of Wildside!
- Mr. Vick: Well then, what do you carry?
- Varges de la Cosa: I don't use a gun. I don't trust them. I respect them, but don't trust them.
- Fake Annie Oakley: Nothing would please me more than to see you with a gun in your hand and three balls in the air!
- [consoling a grieving Bannister]
- Cally Oaks: You know, my father used to say that the three primary colors of grief are despair, pain, and anger, but that it's the nature of crystals to scatter light so that in all of our grief there are other spectrums, other colors. Like the color Courage, the color Strength, the color Love. He'd try and put physics over sadness.
- [shooting the gunbelt and hat off a woman claiming to be Annie Oakley]
- Brodie Hollister: You know, if I had about eight more bullets, this would get real interesting.
- [surveying a corpse]
- Alice Freeze: I've never done a policeman before. Isn't he a lovely sight. He's so... policeman-like.
- Varges de la Cosa: I don't see the attraction. He has skin like eggshells.
- Alice Freeze: Oh, I never meant to imply he could hold a candle to you. When you're dead, you'll be much more attractive.
- Varges de la Cosa: ...Thank you.