Don Ameche credited as playing...
Art Selwyn
- Art Selwyn: [singing] Oh I'm in the mood for love.
- Ben Luckett: Will you listen to this guy, he'll be chasing them dolls 'til his dick runs off.
- Art Selwyn: Oh I'm too old for that sort of thing.
- Joseph Finley: Age isn't everything.
- Art Selwyn: Nope.
- Joseph Finley: Anyway it's all up here.
- Ben Luckett: Not all up there, Pal. Some of it's down here, which I might add is stiff as a board.
- Art Selwyn: You too? You got a boner too?
- Ben Luckett: Blue steel. Cat couldn't scratch it.
- Joseph Finley: I thought I was the only one.
- Art Selwyn: [singing] We're in the mood for love, simply because we've got one.
- Joseph Finley: You think there's cocaine in that pool?
- Ben: Might be.
- Joseph Finley: What if we O.D.?
- Ben: We'll keep an eye on each other. I'll watch him
- [pointing to Joe]
- Ben: , you watch him
- [pointing to Art]
- Ben: , you watch me.
- Art Selwyn: Perfect.
- Bernard Lefkowitz: I'm a citizen. I believe in this country. In 1945, Dutch Scholtz walked into my store and he said...
- Joseph Finley: Bernie, if you don't wanna do this for Rose and you don't wanna do this for yourself that's fine, that's your business, but if you screw this up for the rest of us...
- Bernard Lefkowitz: Don't threaten me, Joe, I don't need any of your threats. We're not doing it and that's final!
- [Walks away]
- Ben Luckett: Anyone having second thoughts?
- Art Selwyn: I'm a citizen too. I was in the navy. I don't see anything wrong with it.
- Ben Luckett: Then you drive. I got no license.
- Art Selwyn: Men should be explorers, no matter how old they are. I don't know about anybody else, but I'm going.
- Art Selwyn: [after witnessing the indoor swimming pool being purchased] Club house is closed, Gentlemen.
- Joseph Finley: Maybe they could give us permission to use the pool. We could pay them something.
- Art Selwyn: It wouldn't be fun if we had permission.
- Joseph Finley: I feel great.
- Ben Luckett: You wouldn't bullshit me?
- Joseph Finley: My God, I'm telling the truth!
- Art Selwyn: Why shouldn't he feel good? I feel tremendous! I'm ready to take on the world!
- Ben Luckett: [about Bess] Gonna do anything about that one?
- Art Selwyn: 'Already have.
- Ben Luckett: Put it to her?
- Art Selwyn: You're disgusting.
- Ben Luckett: So then you haven't, huh?
- Art Selwyn: What?
- Ben Luckett: I said, "so then you haven't."