The Emperor Caligula: 'The Untold Story'

If someone asked me if I was a fan of Aristide Massacessi, I'd probably laugh mockingly into their hurt faces. Yet when I look at the comments I've written for the IMDB, I've reviewed FAR more of his films than anyone else's! Say what you like about the man, but he really knows how to deliver utterly unpredictable and hilarious sleaze when you least expect it- which is probably why I keep finding myself attracted to his films!

CALIGULA: THE UNTOLD STORY is a superb example of this. What possible commercial motivation (other than ripping off the original CALIGULA, obviously) could there be for a movie like this? Within the first few scenes, Michele Soavi has had his tongue graphically cut off, and the fun pops up at regular intervals from there. Unexpected hardcore sequences and yet MORE scenes of equine masturbation (what WAS Massacessi thinking when he thought such scenes could add something to his movies?), plus sleazy violence, come thick and fast. However, unlike Massacessi's other weird attempts at fusing genres (see EMANUELLE IN AMERICA, PORNO HOLOCAUST etc for examples), CALIGULA: THE UNTOLD STORY is actually quite watchable. This is probably because he chose to throw the sleaze into a reasonably interesting (if hideously inaccurate!) historical story, rather than just into a flaccid soft sex film like he normally would.

I can't help but love this. Sure, it's not actually GOOD, but just when you think the film might be going downhill, you get a screen-full of a man being speared to death through his rectum. I have no idea what audience demographic Massacessi was thinking of when he made this, but I can assure you that it comes highly recommended.

Caligula 2: The Untold Story (1982)

* 1/2 (out of 4)

Another notorious film from director Joe D'Amato, this one a cheap rip off of Caligula, although this one is actually a lot better. I watched the uncut, hardcore 125-minute version and this here featured over thirty minutes worth of additional scenes that aren't in the R-rated American cut. All of these scenes are dialogue driven stuff but this here actually slows the film down a lot. There's also a 20+ minute Roman orgy, which is where this film gets its notorious label. Everything from midgets to horses is on display here but this too slows down the action. The cast, including D'Amato regular Laura Gemser, is pretty good as are the sets and costume design. I doubt I'll bother tracking down any of the alternate versions but my guess is that they'd be a bit more entertaining than this longer cut.

I am a history buff, and have done quite a bit of research on late republic--early empire Rome. The funny thing about the film is that the only part that is really historically accurate (aside from Caligula being emperor) is the starting Narration, when an unseen narrator describes Caligula as a "Pervert, glutton, Paranoid, insomniac--this is his story!" After that, fiction takes over, making the movie (and the music) very third rate. Some parts are very disturbing, but gives you a view of the mental capacity of Romans before Christianity took hold of Italy. The acting was second rate. Most of the main players couldn't even speak English, and the 'voice in's' were horribly sequenced. But I must give two thumbs up for David Brandon (Caligula). He played the part so convincingly, with his arrogant, cruel, sadistic actions, that in my opinion, made the movie. <<by the way, does anyone know what David Brandon is up too these days?>> Since it's obvious that the film contains nudity, and many violent scenes, I thought I would focus on the merits (though few and far between). And I must say that the intimate scenes between Laura Gemser (Mariam) and DB are very enticing.

A fact I would never admit to people I want to like me, I am a fan of Joe D'amato flicks. Here he is up to his old tricks; offering over the top blood shed, pointless plotting and (depending on which version you have) some X-rated sex scenes.

If you know anything about history, then there is no point in going through the plot. For those unaware, Caligula was a Ceaser and emperor of Rome. He was also generally regarded as the most brutal, demented ruler the empire ever had.

Joe D'amato strings together a lose revenge tale around his favorite leading lady, 'Black Emmanuel' Laura Gamser (funny, she's Asian). Her friend is killed by the diabolical Emperor in a botched rape attempt and she goes undercover into the place to get vengeance. Along the way we see three-ways, four-ways, prostitute training, a man impaled on a spike, the list just goes on. The coup de grace is a party scene in which we are treated to gladiators killing each other, a horse (yes, I said horse) hand job, and a long (if you have the real unedited version, which to my knowledge is out of print) orgy with all the X-rated trimmings.

D'amato flicks are most certainly an acquired taste. Most will find this to be filth, but if you have the mind for it, then this is one of the sleaze master's best.

6/10

I am quite a Joe D'amato fan for such films as "Anthropophagus" and some of the Emmanuelle series so to my surprise I hadn't heard of this film until about a week ago. Naturally, I went through all the lengths to find the hardcore version of this movie and with luck did find it. This movie is in no way as good as Penthouse's "Caligula" but is in no way a forgettable movie. Anyone that knows the story of Caligula knows he was quite a sick man or should I say monster. This version of the film is definitely XXX and can be quite disturbing even to a person of my tastes. The movie starts off kind of slow except for the very opening scene where you see Italian director Michele Soavi get his nerves cut and his tongue cut out. The movie does pick up and about half way through the movie is an orgy scene that seems to just go on and on. This scene, for me, has some of the most tasteless moments in it. I am not even going to describe it other than there is a horrible beastiality scene which is just wrong on many levels. I think the most disturbing part in the movie is when Caligula finds out he is being conspired against. So naturally, he finds the conspirators and does one of the most horrendous things I have ever scene on film. And what happens to one of the conspirators family is unspeakable. So, if you are a fan of the original "Caligula" I say to check this movie out. Just expect a low budget movie with some horrible scene.