Alf Humphreys credited as playing...
Howard
- Howard Landers: Gretchen I want you to be my date for the dance. Okay?
- Gretchen: Dry up!
- Howard Landers: Gretchen, you know what'd look really good on you?
- Gretchen: What?
- Howard Landers: Me.
- Gretchen: Suck it in and zip it up, will ya?
- Jessie 'T.J.' Hanniger: We'll have a party in the mine!
- Howard Landers: Yeah. Beware of Harry Warden! OOOOOOOHHHHH!
- Hollis: SHUT THE FUCK UP!
- Happy: Beware of what you make fun of, you little asshole!
- Howard Landers: Who?
- Happy: YOU!
- Howard Landers: Well, last one into town gets the broom, lets go!
- Axel Palmer: Okay, let's go, guys!
- Hollis: Yee-haw, whoop!
- [the miner guys head outside to their cars and Hollace struggles to pull up his pants. Howard kicks him in the butt as they run to a beat-up old Volkswagen]
- Jessie 'T.J.' Hanniger: Hey, who busted the lock? I've got the keys right here!
- Gretchen: [annoyed] Ugh, Howard did it.
- Howard Landers: Nope! Harry Warden did it!
- Patty: Eh, what happened to Mike and Harriet?
- Howard Landers: [smiling devilishly] Maybe Harry Warden got 'em!
- Patty: Stop it!
- Hollis: [the miners are all chewing on tobacco] Howard, you've gotta chew it, you don't blow bubbles with it!
- Howard Landers: I'll take care of myself.
- Hollis: How'd you ever get to be so stupid?
- Axel Palmer: Oh Landers, you're gonna need a lot of excersize if you're gonna grapple with Gretchen!
- Howard Landers: Oh yeah? Well I got a valentine for her that she's never gonna forget.
- Axel Palmer: Straight to the heart, eh?
- [Axel makes an offensive gesture with his hands in front of his crotch, implying that Howard's plan is to have sex with Gretchen]
- Howard Landers: Gonna be a hot time on Saturday night, yee-haw!