Never on Tuesday

My review was written in July 1989 after watching the film on Paramount video cassette.

The talent and beauty of Claudia Christian is showcased in "Never on Tuesday", an unreleased 1987 vanity production that should give Paramount Home Video sleeper possibilities due to the presence of several big-name guest stars.

As in his more recent pic, "Tale of Two Sisters", also toplining Christian, filmmaker Adam Rifkin shows great potential in his handling of varied film techniques. Unfortunately, his experimental approach has no extant audience; he might have done better to start with conventional features before plunging into uncharted waters.

Here he sets himself the insurmountable goal of making a static road movie. Andrew Lauer and Pete Berg are two Ohio youths driving to California to meet those fabled west coast beauties. Pic is barely underway when they recklessly crash into Christian's Volkswagen, stranding the three of them in the middle of nowhere.

Passersby refuse to give the hapless trio a lift and Christian announces in the second reel: "I'm a lesbian", thwarting the lecherous intent of our heroes. Rifkin manages to create some variety (and wish-fulfillment sexiness) with frequent fantasy sequences, but it is the periodic visits of quirky, uncredited cameo performers that keep the film going.

Standup comic Gilbert Gottfried pops up with his usual shouting routine to sell the folks something, but won't give them a ride. Charlie Sheen has the best guest spot as a violent ex-con who robs the trio at knifepoint -he plays it for real. Brother Emilio Estevez makes a brief appearance and his "Breakfast Club" co-star Judd Nelson is too hammy as a mustachioed cop to get any laughs.

Golden oldies on the soundtrack make the film easy to take, but Rifkin's bittersweet ending is unsatisfying.