Jeff Goldblum credited as playing...
Mac
- Mac: Joe, take us to hospital, please.
- Joe the Cop: Hey, clown, you're going to the slammer!
- Mac: [looks at Mike the cop, then at Valerie] We go to slammer first.
- Valerie: [to Mac] Listen, give them that love touch, then they'll come on to me. They'll be putty in my hands.
- Mac: You want sex with Joe and Mike?
- Valerie: No, no, just so we can get away. Do it, do it! You'll see.
- Valerie: Wait a minute. Are you like coming on to me? Is this a pass? Because, I mean, if it is, sex is like *totally* out of the question.
- Mac: What is sex?
- Valerie: Sex? You know, making love. A man and a woman like each other and they take their clothes off and...
- Mac: Okay.
- Valerie: Well, no! No, no, no! We can't, no, because, I mean, me and Ted are, uh, are, uh, well, I guess we're not, but, I mean, uh, we can't because, I mean, you're an alien and I'm from the valley and we may not even be, you know, anatomically correct for each other. That could be - a real problem.
- [looks at naked Mac's groin]
- Valerie: No problem. But, I mean, uh, no, no, no. I mean, it just wouldn't work! You're from out of town. The phone bills would just be hell.