Dolly Parton credited as playing...
Truvy Jones
- M'Lynn: [crying] I'm fine, I'm fine, I'm fine.
- [screaming]
- M'Lynn: I'm fine! I can jog all the way to Texas and back, but my daughter can't! She never could! Oh God! I am so mad I don't know what to do! I wanna know why! I wanna know *why* Shelby's life is over! I wanna know how that baby will *ever* know how wonderful his mother was! Will he *ever* know what she went through for him! Oh *God* I wanna know *why*? *Why*? Lord, I wish I could understand!
- [in a firm tone]
- M'Lynn: No! No! No! It's not supposed to happen this way! I'm supposed to go first. I've always been ready to go first! I-I don't think I can take this! I-I don't think I can take this! I-I just wanna *hit* somebody 'til they feel as bad as I do! I just wanna hit something! I wanna hit it hard!
- [continues sobbing]
- Clairee: Here!
- [grabs Ouiser by the shoulder and positions her in front of M'Lynn]
- Clairee: Hit this! Go ahead M'Lynn, slap her!
- Ouiser Boudreaux: [taken aback and confused] Are you crazy?
- Clairee: Hit her!
- Ouiser Boudreaux: Are you *high*, Clairee?
- Truvy: [in a frightened tone] Clairee, have you lost your mind?
- Clairee: We'll sell t-shirts sayin' "I SLAPPED OUISER BOUDREAUX!" Hit her!
- Annelle: [in a scared tone] Ms. Clairee, enough!
- Clairee: Ouiser, this is your chance to do something for your fellow man! Knock her lights out, M'Lynn!
- Ouiser Boudreaux: [snatches away] Let go o' me!
- Clairee: M'Lynn, you just missed the chance of a lifetime! Half o' Chiquapin Parish'd give their eye teeth to take a whack at Ouiser!
- Truvy: Louie brought his new girlfriend over, and the nicest thing I can say about her is all her tattoos are spelled correctly.
- Truvy: You are playin' hard to get!
- Clairee Belcher: At her age, she should be playin' beat the clock.
- Truvy: Oh sweetheart don't. Please don't cry or I will too. I have a strict policy that nobody cries alone in my presence.
- Shelby: Truvy, you know what you need in here? You need a radio, takes the pressure off of everyone feeling they have to talk so much.
- Truvy: I had one once, but I threw it up against the wall when I couldn't figure out where the batteries went. I know now I was suffering from pre-menstrual syndrome.