Quotes

Jaws: The Revenge

Michael Brody: [to torch-wielding welder wife Carla] I've always wanted to make love to an angry welder. I've dreamed of nothing else since I was a small boy.

Michael Brody: How come it's my responsibility?
Carla Brody: Because.
Michael Brody: Oh. OK, now I understand; all you had to do was explain it. I take out the garbage... because.

Hoagie Newcombe: [last lines, as he is leaving] When I come back, remind to tell you about the time I took 100 nuns to Nairobi!

Jake: [to Michael and his crewmates] If mediocrity were fat, you'd all be whales!

Thea: It's not nice to be evasive. My mother says that to my father all the time.

Michael Brody: You weren't exactly a deprived kid. Think I buy that roots-rock-reggae bullshit, forget it. Cut that hair, and you're nothing but a three-piece suit.

Louisa: Don't go weak in the knees on me tonight, boy. You're gonna need all the strength you got.

Mr. Witherspoon: "Get to the point, man," as my wife now says. Okay. Well, in short, art is grease for the wheel of life.

Narrator: [Only on older TV versions] Since time immemorial, events have taken place with no evident reason for their happening. Such phenomena has been man's dilemma and the subject of constant philosophical discussion. When there is no factor motivating an event, no case of cause creating effect, what triggered the action: fate or circumstances? What you are about to see concerns such an event. Maybe you can determine whether we are dealing here, with circumstances, or fate.

Jake: Look at you, boy.
William: What about me?
Jake: Man, you're a mental midget and you're still readin' all day. You know, if mediocrity were fattening, you'd all be whales.

Hoagie Newcombe: If I go any faster this thing will turn into a flying Cuisinart and we'll all be diced into oblivion!

Jake: I'm getting tired of all this paradise shit! It's gettin' on my last and only nerve, man.

Ellen Brody: You know what? Let's pretend this is Buckingham Palace. And you'll be Princess Di, and we'll have a parade with horses. And you'll ride in a golden carriage.

Jake: My father used to say to me, "Jake - Jake, man, you got two loves in your life. What you do and who you're with."

Hoagie Newcombe: I knew a one-armed piano player once. Took two minutes to play the Minute Waltz.

Carla Brody: [in bed, tossing her panties to Michael] I'll help you take your mind off things, sailor.

Jake: As the sun slowly sets in the west, we bid a fond farewell to the family of conch.

Jake: When I was a small boy, my father said to me, "Jake - Jake, never do anything today you can put off till tomorrow." And them conch gonna be there tomorrow.

Jake: Boy, you don't know shit about anything. It's time you learned. I'll teach you how to wear your hair. I'll teach you how to dance. Come on. Teach you how to box. Come on, follow me. Get your butt down here, man.

Carla Brody: I don't think he's spent much time with a woman like you.
Ellen Brody: I don't know what he thinks. I don't know what I think. I don't know why we're even talking about this.

Jake: They spend half their lives looking for food, and the other half eating it, they don't care what it is.
Hoagie Newcombe: Maybe he's got indigestion. He's already eaten my plane!

Jake: Everything's cool. You know, I'm thinkin' about yesterday. It's probably all a mistake. He was just hungry. You got that tasty look, you know?
Michael Brody: Yeah, but how come only me, though, you know?
Jake: Maybe he just like white meat.
Michael Brody: You're a funny guy, Jake.

Jake: She'll be fine, partner. She'll never find that bloody shark, man. We couldn't.
Hoagie Newcombe: It'll find her.