Whoopi Goldberg credited as playing...
Deloris
- [Last lines]
- Ahmal James: Rumor has it that you're a Las Vegas showgirl?
- Sister Mary Clarence: Let's get one thing straight, my dear Ahmal. I am not, nor have I ever been, a Las Vegas showgirl. I am a headliner!
- Sister Mary Clarence: Now listen, I know you've got to think about your image, cause image is important to you, because of course your friends are gonna dictate your actions through the rest of your lives, and I wouldn't want you to step away from them and become an individual, that would almost be too much!
- Sister Mary Clarence: My name is Sister Mary Clarence and I am...
- Frankie: [interrupts her] Yo mama!
- Sister Mary Clarence: No, sir, let's talk about your mama. Who's so dumb she got hit by a parked car!
- Sister Mary Clarence: If you want to be somebody, if you want to go somewhere, you better wake up and pay attention.
- Sister Mary Clarence: Good morning, ladies and gentlemen. Please take your seats. Do it quickly and quietly. Welcome to the first day of your new scholastic lives. This is no longer a bird course. The bird has flown. If you want to pass this course, you gonna have to earn it, 'cause I have no problems, not one, failing each and every one of you.
- Sketch Pinshum: Yo. I never thought this was no bird course.
- Sister Mary Clarence: I'm glad for you. Very, very glad. Because this is a new day. Things are going to be a little different around here.
- Frankie: Oh, yeah?
- Sister Mary Clarence: Uh-huh.
- Frankie: Like how?
- Sister Mary Clarence: Like when I talk, Fran-KAY, you don't!
- [Some girls passed notes around and when it got to Maria, she giggled. Sister Mary Clarence walks to her and points to the note]
- Sister Mary Clarence: Is this somethin' you wanna share with the rest of the class?
- Maria: No, I'm just kickin' it with my girl.
- Sister Mary Clarence: Well. I'll tell you what. You gonna kick it with me, or I'm gonna kick you out! What you think of THAT? Put 'em away.
- [Margaret is looking in her compact and putting blush on her face]
- Sister Mary Clarence: And you. This is not Elizabeth Arden, Miss Thing. You wanna beat that mug of yours, you do it before you come to my class. You understand me? Put it away.
- [Sketch has his head down on his desk]
- Sister Mary Clarence: And you. Sketch. I like you a lot. But I don't want you catchin' z's in my class no more.
- Sketch Pinshum: I be tired. I got a job l...
- Sister Mary Clarence: Baby, save it for Oprah. This is a brand-new day, ladies and gentlemen. A BRAND-new day. We're gonna start with respect. You're gonna respect me and I'm gonna respect you.
- Sister Mary Clarence: If you wake up in the morning, and you can't think anything but singing, then you should be a singer, girl.
- Sister Mary Clarence: [after Maria has said she doesn't know the words of a song and her classmates snicker] Hey, hey - excuse me! It is NOT Maria's fault, that she does not know that Mary had a lamb. It is not - and I say this to you - it is *not* Maria's fault. Because maybe, MAYBE where Maria came from, Mary had a dog! Or a lil kitty cat! Or a little bald headed brother named Bart! It is NOT her fault and we're not going to tell her it is, are we? No, we are not!
- Father Ignatius: Sursum corda.
- Sister Mary Clarence: Wait a minute, what was that?
- Father Ignatius: It's Latin. It means "lift up your heart".
- Sister Mary Clarence: Oh, I'm sorry, I thought you said "insert some quarters."
- Sister Mary Clarence: And the first thing you're gonna do, gentlemen, is take off those hats. This is a brand... new... day.
- [class laughs at boys' hair]
- Sister Mary Clarence: I guess that means you're gonna be combing your hair before you come to my class.
- [to girl behind Rita]
- Sister Mary Clarence: And, I know you're laughing over there 'cause you think this is very funny, Miss Thing, but there is no sun in this room, you will not get a tan. Take off those sunglasses.
- [turns to "hat" boys]
- Sister Mary Clarence: That goes for you, too. If they're not prescription, I don't wanna see 'em. I want to see YOU, I want to be able to look into YOUR eyes, I want you to be able to look into mine.
- Sister Mary Clarence: Hey Father Thomas, what's happenin'?
- Father Thomas: What's happening is I've been sent to deliver a message like I'm working for Western Union instead of the Roman Catholic Church.
- Sister Mary Clarence: So because you think they sang it better you all are ready to leave 'cause you got scared? Aw yea, nah, that's your MO. See that's how you operate: Ooo, something new, better run away! Forget about all the people who busted their butt to get you here 'cause they believed in you. Let me remind you of something, ok: if you wanna go somewhere and you wanna be somebody, you better wake up and pay attention. Because if every time something scary comes up you decide to run, y'all gonna be running for the rest of your lives.
- Sister Mary Clarence: Do you know what I hate most about this place? There is nothing to pick up and throw.
- Sister Mary Clarence: Yes, Miss Watson?
- Rita Watson: We don't want no new way. The old way was fine for us.
- [turns to class]
- Rita Watson: Right?
- [class agrees]
- Rita Watson: So, if you're gonna fail us, you might as well just go ahead, 'cause we ain't doing nothing!
- Sister Mary Clarence: Fine. If that's the way you feel, there's the door. Don't let it hit you in the butts on the way out.
- Sketch Pinshum: Yo, yo, Sis... I can't afford to fail this class!
- Sister Mary Clarence: You better tell your friend you can't afford to fail this class!
- Tyler Chase: My parents wouldn't be pleased.
- Rita Watson: Come on, ya'll, we ain't gotta take this from her! Come on! Sketch, come on, man.
- [Sketch shakes head no]
- Rita Watson: Fran-kay?
- Frankie: Yo, Rita, you know I'm usually down for stuff like this. But, I'm gonna take care of business this time.
- Sister Mary Clarence: A little lonely on that limb by yourself, Miss Watson?
- Rita Watson: [despondent] So much for friendship!
- [storms out door]
- Mother Superior: You are the perfect example of a how a sow's ear can be turned into a silk purse.
- Sister Mary Clarence: Hmm. Well, I probably wouldn't put it quite like that.
- [the students are standing at the top of a stairwell full of cobwebs]
- Sister Mary Clarence: Hurry up, I wouldn't want any of those spiders to get in those weaves some of you are wearing, I can tell.
- [Father Wolfgang offers Sister Mary Clarence some gross-looking food]
- Sister Mary Clarence: Oh no, no, no... Jenny Craig, I just couldn't, thank you so much.
- Father Maurice: [lifts the sausage on his own plate, then replaces it] This, uh... needs a prayer.
- [to Rita Louise Watson during roll call]
- Sister Mary Clarence: We'll just call you Rita, Diva with a 'Tude.
- Sister Mary Clarence: [entering the rap circle] I got the flow, you all gotta go, so pick up your bags so we can go, ho-ho! Uh-huh, ow, ow, NOW! Thank you, thank you.