- Axel: Hey.
- Mrs. Todd: I understand that you were with him at the end.
- Axel: Yeah, his last words were about you.
- Mrs. Todd: That does not sound like my Douglas, Axel. Try again.
- Axel: Actually his last words were 'Axel are you on a coffee break, go and get that son of a bitch.' Those were his last words.
- Mrs. Todd: That sounds like my Douglas.
- Axel: Yeah, sounds like a good idea, too.
- Axel: What'd they promote you to captain, or something?
- Det. Sgt. William 'Billy' Rosewood: I'm DDO-JSIOC.
- Axel: The jay gee jojo see? What is that?
- Axel: [Axel is dressed up as Oki-Doki the elephant]
- Little Kid: Oki-Doki.
- [runs over and hugs him]
- Axel: Hey, nice little kid. How you doin'? Nice little boy. Good to see you.
- Little Kid: I love you Oki-Doki.
- Big Kid: Hey, Oki. Do the Oki Shuffle.
- Axel: [starts to jump around] Oki-Doki, Oki-Doki, Doki Doki Oki.
- Big Kid: THAT'S NOT RIGHT. IT'S LIKE THIS.
- [does the Oki Shuffle]
- Axel: Hey listen, kid, I'm Oki-Doki and I changed the steps. You got a problem with that?
- Big Kid: YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE NICE TO ME NO MATTER WHAT I DO.
- [punches him in the stomach]
- Axel: Oh, you little motherfucker. I'll kick your ass.
- Det. Sgt. William 'Billy' Rosewood: [outdraws a henchman, killing him] Name is Wild Bill Rosewood. I'm the sheriff of this town.
- [flips the gun and puts it in his holster]
- Orrin Sanderson: Mr. Foley, Mr. DeWald.
- Axel: [Goes to attack DeWald, is restrained by security guards] You fuck! Motherfucker! That's him! Motherfucker! That's the fuckin' guy I'm looking for!
- Ellis De Wald: Orrin, you want to tell me what's going on here?
- Axel: This fuckin' guy shot a Detroit police officer last weekend!
- Ellis De Wald: Last weekend? I was at my beach house in Laguna *last weekend*.
- Axel: Your beach home in Laguna?
- [starts to calm down]
- Axel: Wait, wait, hold it, I think I got the wrong guy, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. This is a big...
- [to security guards]
- Axel: I'm cool. It's a big misunderstanding.
- Axel: [to DeWald] I know you got your beach...
- [goes at DeWald again and is restrained]
- Axel: No fuckin' beach house in Laguna, you motherfucker!
- Det. Sgt. William 'Billy' Rosewood: [In prison] I'm all washed up - dead in the water.
- Axel: Will you stop worrying? I talked to Flint, he's gonna get us outta here.
- Det. Sgt. William 'Billy' Rosewood: I REALLY like that office!
- Ellis De Wald: You caught him. Good. He broke into a security area.
- Axel: [stands up and security guards grabs him] Hey, relax.
- Axel: [to De Wald] Why don't you save that shit for New Talent Night at San Quentin. I'm onto your operation.
- Ellis De Wald: [acting confused] My operation?
- Jon Flint: [walks in] Goddamn it, Axel, what the hell have you done now?
- Ellis De Wald: He went berserk. He was firing a weapon in the park. My God, there are hundreds of small innocent children around.
- Axel: You know they don't give out Oscars in prison, right?
- Jon Flint: [after everything is all over] Any chance you can explain any of this to me? Like why the fuck am I shot?
- Jon Flint: Look, isn't it just possible that you're mistaken, Foley? That Ellis Dewald just resembles Todd's killer?
- Axel: I made the guy in Detroit. It was Dewald.
- Jon Flint: I mean, Dewald is the head of the largest private police department in Southern California. I mean, he works with us! With the L.A.P.D. Hell, with the governor's office! Everybody loves him.
- Det. Sgt. William 'Billy' Rosewood: He's even getting an award tonight from the National Association of Security Agencies.
- Jon Flint: Axel, it's understandable that you're distraught and-and looking for justice, and not to mention revenge. But, isn't it just possible that you - that you want it so much, that you saw your killer in a man who bore a slight resemblance?
- Det. Sgt. William 'Billy' Rosewood: Hell, we run into this all the time in police work, Axel.
- Axel: Where's Dewald getting that award tonight?
- Jon Flint: Axel, don't.
- Axel: Hey Flint, your friend Dewald is foul, okay? I know he's foul and I'm goin' down to this award show tonight and I'm gonna put some pressure on him and maybe I'll panic him into doing something stupid.
- Det. Sgt. William 'Billy' Rosewood: Axel, if you go to that dinner tonight... I'm going with you.
- Axel: Then pick me up at the Sunset Motel.
- Dispatcher: Attention, all cars in the vicinity of Wonder World. Proceed there immediately. We have a 10-19, 10-45, and 12-22 in progress.
- Jon Flint: Why am I not surprised?
- Axel: [Before commencing a raid] Everybody ready here? Nobody need to take a nervous piss or nothing?
- Serge: One thing that's very important at the Survival Boutique, I feel that it's my personality, my philosophy, that everything must conform to the three P's, which is Protection, Prestige, and Pretty!
- Steve Fulbright: God dammit Foley! We spent a whole fucking year with our noses up De Wald's ass, we are THIS CLOSE to locking this thing up, and YOU, you piss all over us! Our case is blown! You're going back to Detroit! And I'll tell you something else, if you weren't a cop, I'd have you doin' dead-time at Leavenworth, FOR LIFE!
- Axel: [Cutting in front of a couple to get on the Spider ride] Excuse me!
- Disappointed Man: Hey!
- Disappointed Girl: That's not fair!
- Axel: Maintenance, I gotta go grease the chain. Hear how dry it sounds?
- Axel: [Axel is dangling from a rope outside of the passenger cart of the broken Spider ride] Hi! See this rope? We're gonna try slide down this rope all the way to the ground.
- Scared Boy: We are?
- Axel: We're gonna try!
- Orrin Sanderson: Our head of security has confirmed your identity with the Detroit police. But neither they, nor I, understand what you're doing at Wonder World.
- Axel: I told you, I was investigating a crime. I think I'm in the right place because I've been here for ten minutes and already been shot at!
- Axel: Billy, you got a fifty dollar bill?
- Det. Sgt. William 'Billy' Rosewood: When do I get it back?
- Axel: Man, gimme fifty dollars!
- Axel: Is this the illegal chop shop, one of them illegal places where they chop up cars? Coz I got a Buick out here belonging to my wife and I wanna get the shit chopped up, because the bitch ain't been acting right, y'know what I mean?
- Axel: You got a refrigerator in your office? Man, J. Edgar Hoover didn't even have a refrigerator in his office. Just maybe some hair curlers and a dryer or something.
- Serge: [Seeing an attractive model in a promotional video for the Annihilator 2000] You think those are real?
- Dispatcher: All units in the vicinity of Wonder World - proceed immediately to assist in emergency rescue.
- Jon Flint: Axel!
- Steve Fulbright: I ran a check on you, Foley. You're a hell of a detective, but something of a maverick. I know what you're doing. I know the drill. You hassle De Wald, you get him to panic, make a rash move. But God damn it Foley, we do NOT want to panic this man! We want him doing business as FUCKING usual, do you copy me Foley?
- Det. Sgt. William 'Billy' Rosewood: [On his headset] Negatory, SWAT. Hold for our arrival. ETA... eleven minutes. Out.
- Axel: Billy, who were you just talking to?
- Det. Sgt. William 'Billy' Rosewood: The truck was discovered inside the county green line. So I coordinated with the SMPD, BHPD, LAPD, Sherriff and Los Angeles County, Supervisor of Parks and Recreation, California State Highway Control and District Attorney's Office and United States Naval Shore Patrol!
- Steve Fulbright: I thought I put you on a plane to Detroit.
- Axel: You're gonna be really glad that I stayed. Like I said, I know what you're investigating, and what you're looking for is right here!
- Steve Fulbright: Yeah? And what am I investigating?
- Axel: Paper, US Mint quality. That's what was in that hijacked truck back in Detroit. You wanted to follow the truck, back to LA, so you could track De Wald and find out where his fucken print shop is! Well, it's right here in Wonder World!
- Orrin Sanderson: What an earth is this maniac raving about?
- Ellis De Wald: He's insane! He's proved that!
- Steve Fulbright: What's happened here Detective Foley, is you got yourself in the middle of a federal investigation.
- Axel: What is this, income tax? The fucken guy in the truck, just shot a Detroit police officer!
- Jon Flint: [on the phone with Axel who is in jail with Billy] You and Billy disturbing the peace?
- [sarcastically]
- Jon Flint: NO.
- [laughs]
- Axel: Do me a favor, just make your fuckin' phone call and get us outta here, alright.
- Jon Flint: Sure, sure, sure I will. Let's see, now who do I know down there? Let's see...
- Axel: Hey, don't fuck with me right now.
- Jon Flint: Alright, keep your shirt on. I'll get you guys out. Oh, incidentally I think we found that truck you were looking for.
- Axel: Where?
- Jon Flint: By the Santa Monica Pier at the beach. I'm headed out there now and I'll pick you guys up on the way. Oh and Axel, in the meantime, don't take any showers.
- [laughs]