- Lauren (segment "The Campfire"): How about this weekend just you and me do something together.
- Alex (segment "The Campfire"): No guys?
- Lauren (segment "The Campfire"): No guys.
- Alex (segment "The Campfire"): [reading old newspaper] Police speculate that the murder weapon was an ice-pick or possibly even a meat-hook. They say they have a suspect, but they haven't made an arrest yet.
- Cliff (segment "The Campfire"): That's pretty freaky shit.
- Scott Anderson: [about Heather's father] Is he around?
- [Heather gestures]
- Scott Anderson: He's dancing? Okay, he's not dancing, he's uh, rowing? No, he's, he's boxing, he's boxing? Your dad's not a boxer is he? Okay... he's horseback riding! He's a horseback rider.
- Alex (segment "The Campfire"): [after hearing "The Honeymoon" story] I know one thing, I'm not driving to Las Vegas on my honeymoon.
- Cliff (segment "The Campfire"): I don't think you have to worry about a honeymoon.
- Cliff (segment "The Campfire"): [Peeing in the bushes] So you got hair on your balls yet?
- Eric (segment "The Campfire"): [Peeing in the bushes] You're so immature.
- Cliff (segment "The Campfire"): [Peeing in the bushes] I guess that means no.