Larry Miller credited as playing...
Dean Al Valentine
- Dean Al Valentine: [In a meeting with the rest of the professors, Dean Valentine tries to come up with a way to make the school more popular for young people. One professor suggests a scholarship program to which Dean Valentine detests immediately] No, no, no. I'm tired of trying to buy students.
- Dean Al Valentine: I want them fighting to get in here.
- Dean Al Valentine: Begging us for applications.
- Dean Al Valentine: And I mean the best students too!
- Dean Al Valentine: [Dean Valentines shows the professors a list of which students should go in order to boost more popularity for incoming new students] If you want the garden to grow, you weave it. If you want the gazelle herd to thrive, you let the slow ones get eaten. Therefore, I say we get rid of them all!
- Dean Al Valentine: "Contest thing"?
- [Frustrated, he turns to the rest of his colleagues]
- Dean Al Valentine: And he teaches English...
- [shakes his head]
- Dean Al Valentine: [after a dramatic pause. Dean Valentine pretends to be touched and cry] I think that's the most beautiful thing that you-
- [Looks at the rest of his colleagues]
- Dean Al Valentine: Do you love this man?
- [Stops mocking now]
- Dean Al Valentine: What's wrong with you? That's the problem with you teacher types, you know? You got your head in the closet. Not practical. Like you're little computer purchase.
- Dean Al Valentine: I know what you meant.
- Dean Al Valentine: Let me tell you something about the College Knowledge Bowl.
- Dean Al Valentine: Last time Medfield competed, we placed 64th.
- Dean Al Valentine: Now that's not bad... until you consider that the total number of schools in the competition was ALSO 64!
- Dean Al Valentine: In other words, LAST!
- Dean Al Valentine: Janitors left us after that...