Telling You

Saw this on Comedy Central last month. Some of it is downright silly but throughout there was something sad and honest about it. Facinelli and Mihok are great together. Scenes with the old man (who apparently is the Ancient Mariner of Coleridge's epic poem) are compelling but kind of seem out of place. Or maybe not- that's what I mean by weird. The movie has a confused leading character and the story doesn't exactly clear things up, but in a way, that's the point. The actors get to be outrageous but everyone knows these types of people so it's a believable world. Kinda reminds me of that idle time right after college, back at home, and not knowing what, if anything was going to become of life. Good parts, good ending, but it makes very amateur mistakes.

Potentially misleading - Jennifer Love Hewitt's top billing

for a minor character - but, appealing nonetheless. A

pizza store serves as a backdrop for ruminations on life & lost opportunities. Hard to figure whether the film

embraces or condemns the job as measure of success ethos; count this confusion as a strength. Sad to say,

Hewitt annoys as a shrill novice fashion-designer - misses "cute" sliding straight into "grating". The opening dog s*** tale's good (minus the punchline) & "Soccer Ball" is the greatest tune The Offspring never

wrote. What's with the Coleridge reference? Quality Low-Bud effort.

I rented this movie because I'm a fan of Jennifer Love Hewitt, and I'm actually glad I did so I could warn other unsuspecting fans off this slow, boring and completely pointless production. The only positive comment I can make is that I was actually quite pleased with JLH's performance as the hyper and audible Deb Friedman. Peter Facinelli served little purpose except to give myself and other female viewers some delicious eye candy; his "Badda Boom Badda Bing" accent was a complete turnoff and totally over the top. The most abhorrent feature of this film, rather than the plot (which, in all truthfulness, I didn't even understand, and the film ended without me even knowing what happened) was the performance of Dash Mihok. Besides having no chemistry with the other members of the cast (especially the girl he lusted after), his delivery is bland and at times incomprehensible. Bottom line, avoid this stinker at all costs.

No stars.

Although everyone else who commented detested this movie, I liked it, a lot. I rented it a few months ago, and decided to buy it cheap last week. I think that the slow movement of it was a positive factor, and that it didn't overload or bombard the viewer. It was a lazy, relaxed, detached attitude; the perfect kind of movie to watch on a Sunday afternoon when feeling down on your luck. I think it might be better suited to interpretation as a play, because the action is more verbal than visual. It does make some attempt at developing characters, within its short runtime. The only part I disliked was the ending--unexpectedly abrupt and brief. I will also say, that this movie holds a "spot in my heart" for having perhaps the saddest moment I have ever seen in a movie. After Howard (the weird, smart, and nice guy of the five) spends much time and effort into interacting with a girl at the bar, he is brushed off in a terrible and heartbreaking manner that hit home because I know I'll be hearing the same line someday. . .

"All money hangin' out like a big ol' pimp!" If you've seen this movie, you'll probably remember this line. I love Matthew Lillard. But this movie was really bad! His parts were pretty funny, but the rest of the movie was just kinda thrown together. I didn't like it at all!