Portia de Rossi credited as playing...
Jennifer Kelliho
- Frankie: Hi.
- Father Andrew Kiernan: Hello
- Frankie: You have an appointment, or...
- Father Andrew Kiernan: No, I don't.
- Frankie: Well, would you like a haircut, a manicure, or maybe you'd like to have your nipples pierced?
- Father Andrew Kiernan: [chuckles] Well, maybe if we start with a trim, we could go from there. Thank you.
- Frankie: Come on. Have a seat. All right, here we go.
- [puts barber cape on Andrew]
- Frankie: I'm gonna put this cape on so you don't get your scratchy neck.
- Father Andrew Kiernan: Oh, thank you.
- Frankie: So, where are you from.
- Father Andrew Kiernan: I live in Rome, actually.
- Frankie: Oh, cool.
- Father Andrew Kiernan: And you?
- Frankie: I'm from Naples.
- Father Andrew Kiernan: Ah! Naples.
- Frankie: Mmm-hmm
- Father Andrew Kiernan: [speaks italian] Naples.
- Frankie: Naples, Florida.
- Father Andrew Kiernan: Oh!
- Frankie: I moved here to go to school.
- Father Andrew Kiernan: Which school?
- Frankie: [points to certificate] Claudia's University of Cosmetology. See, I'm'm accredited.
- Father Andrew Kiernan: Oh, Cool.
- Jennifer Kelliho: [to Donna] Am I going crazy or is Frankie hitting on a priest
- Frankie: What do I call you? I feel kind of weird calling a guy I could date "Father." Uhh, I mean, I couldn't date you, but... You know.
- Father Andrew Kiernan: Oh, no, no, no, you just made my day. Thank you. You can call me Andrew. Andrew Kiernan, that's my name.
- Frankie: [after long pause; mouths Donna's name] I know this is gonna sound kind of strange, but I've sort of been expecting you.
- Jennifer Kelliho: [talking about her date] So uh.. he seemed pretty cool. Divorced, but no kids. But he left the table in the middle of dinner to call his mother in Oregon. Yeah you know, I.. I thought I'd give him a shot. But you won't believe what he did. Every single time he took a bite of his steak, he growled!
- Jennifer Kelliho: [Frankie has just entered for work] How you feeling?
- Frankie: Fine.
- Donna Chadway: Really okay or just okay?
- Frankie: I'm fine. So how's my day looking?
- Donna Chadway: Well, I started your first client, and you're booked solid until 7:00.
- Frankie: Thanks.
- [to her client]
- Frankie: Wanna come over here? Okay, well, go back to Jen and dish the dirt.
- Donna Chadway: Hey... Frankie
- Jennifer Kelliho: Hey Frankie.
- Cheryl: Hey Frankie
- Frankie Paige: [after a long pause,takes off her parka jacket] Hey I feel like I should do a monologue or something. Hey, Cheryl come on over here and have a seat I'll just be a second.
- Cheryl: Um, you know what I think I'm just going to wait for Donna.
- Frankie Paige: Ok.
- Jennifer Kelliho: [whispering] What's going on with her.
- Donna Chadway: She wants to get a second opinion, I think she might have epilepsy.
- Jennifer Kelliho: Epilepsy? She doesn't look too good. Why is she even at work?
- Frankie Paige: Hey would you guys stop whispering, like this was a goddamn church!