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Michael Keaton and Kelly Preston in Jack Frost (1998)

Quotes

Jack Frost

Edit
  • Charlie: But Dad...!
  • Jack: Butt Dad? Did you just call me Butt Dad? Is that the kind of thing Coach Gronic is teaching you guys? Butt Dad? By the way, that would make you Butt Boy.
  • Charlie: But...
  • Jack: [climbs into a car] Bye Butt Family!
  • Jack: My balls are freezin! I never thought I'd say THAT with a smile on my face.
  • Charlie: Rory, you know what it's like to have no dad.
  • Rory Buck: Yeah, I do. It sucks! A snowdad is better than no dad.
  • Charlie: You the man!
  • Jack: NO, I'm the SNOWMAN!
  • Jack: Three balls, two sticks, one corked nose. Snowman? No. Much, much more. I am the Wizard of Blizzard! Hahahahahaha! Now run you little mountain goats!
  • Jack: You know, sometimes it's good to have a big butt.
  • Jack: I just have to accept it. I accept I'm a snowman. Okay.
  • [screams loudly]
  • Jack: SID!
  • [Jack is pelted with two snowballs, which stick to his chest and become like boobs]
  • Jack: ...Nah.
  • [throws them back]
  • [first words as a snowman]
  • Jack: I'm home.
  • Jack: Hey, pal. You were the one who played on the magic harmonica!
  • Charlie: What? Magic harmonica? I thought you made that up!
  • Jack: So did I!
  • Jack: Whhhhrrrr. Pull your vehicle over to the right.
  • [Rory is distracted and tumbles down the hill to the right]
  • Jack: Perfect.
  • Charlie: Hold on. This is really weird. I just hugged a snowman!
  • Natalie: Go pick on someone as dumb as you!
  • Rory Buck: As dumb as me?
  • Natalie: I hope you know that school bullies make up 75% of our prison population.
  • [Jack discovers he is a snowman]
  • Jack: [sees his genitals are gone] Oh, no!
  • Jack: [when he came home] Boy, something smells goo...
  • Gabby Frost: You promised him, didn't you? Why'd you go and do that, Jack? How many times have I told you if you're not going to be there, don't say you're going to be there. You know how I knew you promised him? He kept looking at me up in the stands. And after about I don't know the 40th time, I realized he expected you to be there. Jack, I don't care if you get too busy or you flake out on me. Well, I care, but I chose it. I married you. I'll deal with it. He didn't choose this, Jack. One of these days, Charlie is going to score his first goal and you won't see it. Just like you never saw him with the measles, or the time he jammed the Fig Newtons into the slide projector. You know, those things only happen once, then they're gone.
  • Jack: I...
  • Gabby Frost: Don't, Jack. You said enough.
  • Charlie: Mac! Mac, wake up! Chester just peed on a live snowman!
  • Charlie: Snow peas. You should like these.
  • Rory Buck: Snow dad is better than no dad.
  • [last lines]
  • Jack: l will always hear you.
  • [Gabby sticks Charlie's school Report Card to the fridge with a magnet]
  • Gabby Frost: Yes!
  • Sid Gronic: Okay, first period's behind us. Forget about it, god knows I'm going to try. Look, I know you're just kids. And we're really here to teach you about fair play, sportsmanship, and all that crap. But I am so tired of looking up at that scoreboard, and seeing that we're behind the Devils again and again and again!
  • Tuck Gronic: [calms Sid down] Lighten up, dad.
  • Sid Gronic: Sorry. History's made by winners, conquerors, barbarians! Now I want you to go out there AND WIPE THE ICE WITH YOUR FILTHY BUTTS! ALL RIGHT?
  • [calmly]
  • Sid Gronic: Play clean, have a good game.
  • Mac MacArthur: Hey, Charlie. Want a lift home?
  • Charlie: No, I'm not going home.
  • Mac MacArthur: You shouldn't be walking in the middle of the road.
  • Charlie: No one's around. I'll be fine.
  • Mac MacArthur: Okay. Well, I'll see you tonight.
  • Charlie: Why?
  • Mac MacArthur: I'm babysitting. Well not babysitting, you're not a baby. We can hang out while your mom Christmas shops.
  • Charlie: Oh. All right.
  • Mac MacArthur: See you later, Charlie.
  • Jack: I was so busy trying to make my mark on the world, I didn't... You are my mark on the world.
  • Rory Buck: Eat snow, you little wieners!
  • Gabby Frost: Charlie, it's a long drive from Denver. You know he won't be back until late. This drain I don't get it. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. So?
  • Charlie: So?
  • Gabby Frost: So not turning over your report card right away is a bad sign.
  • Charlie: Oh.
  • [gives a report card to Gabby]
  • Charlie: I'm going to go play hockey in the driveway.
  • [then runs off]
  • Gabby Frost: Hey, hey, hey! Running away that's another bad sign.
  • [takes a look at the report card]
  • Gabby Frost: Woo hoo! You may have your father's looks, but you get your brains from me. Yes! Good work, Charlie. Wait till your dad sees this.
  • Mac MacArthur: [watching Stevie Ray Vaughan perform on tv with Charlie] Your dad loved this guy. They even played together a couple of times.
  • Charlie: Nice to know that he had time for someone.
  • Natalie: Come on, Dad, put the head on.
  • Natalie's Dad: Okay, Natalie, pack some snow in there. All right, let's go in the house, you guys. Come on, it's getting cold.
  • Natalie: I'm going to get you now! Gotcha!
  • Jack: [on where he got the harmonica from a singer] Gave me this? He says, "Son, I want you to have this. It's gonna give you the power."
  • Charlie: Come on, Dad. Seriously. Where'd you get it?
  • Jack: All right. You want to know where I got it? I got that... the morning you were born.
  • Charlie: Really?
  • Jack: Yep. Little music store right across the street from the hospital. I walked out in a great mood, bought myself that harmonica, and I've never had a harmonica that played better than that one. My favorite one. Now it's yours.
  • Charlie: Thanks.
  • Jack: You're welcome. Now go to sleep. Son... I want you go to sleep now.
  • Charlie: [about the harmonica] It's awesome!
  • Jack: Okay, man. See you in the morning.
  • Charlie: Hey, Dad?
  • Jack: Yo?
  • Charlie: We're playing hockey tomorrow. Can you come?
  • Jack: Yes, sir. Oh, wait a minute. I can't. We have to go into the studio tomorrow.
  • Charlie: Well, you know the game's not till 4:00. And it's against our arch rivals, the Devils.
  • Jack: You're 11. You have arch rivals?
  • Charlie: Yeah.
  • Jack: 4:00... Yeah, what am I thinking? I'm there. I'm there.
  • Charlie: Really?
  • Jack: Definitely.
  • Jack: Hey you know another thing about this harmonica? It has magic powers.
  • Charlie: Yeah, right.
  • Jack: Yeah, right. I'm serious. When you play that, no matter where I am... I can hear it.
  • Charlie: Right.
  • Jack: I'm telling you. Night.
  • Charlie: Night.
  • Jack: Love you. Go to sleep.
  • [Charlie plays the harmonica and Jack opens the door]
  • Jack: You looking for the power?
  • Charlie: Just testing it.
  • Jack: Hey, what are you pulling an all-nighter?
  • [In a joking tone]
  • Jack: Get your skinny little butt in that bed. Nice work on that snowman, dude.
  • Charlie: Thanks.
  • Jack: Except you made his head way too big.
  • Charlie: I made the head to big?
  • Jack: Yep.
  • Charlie: You were the one putting the bottom ball on the top ball.
  • Jack: How you doing?
  • Charlie: Good.
  • Jack: Yeah.
  • Charlie: How was Denver?
  • Jack: Denver's pretty cool.
  • Charlie: Cool. How are the guys?
  • Jack: Guys are great. Everybody says hi to you.
  • Charlie: So...?
  • Jack: So...?
  • Charlie: Is there anything you need to show me?
  • Jack: Like?
  • Charlie: Like, you know something in the shape of a present.
  • Jack: Oh, you mean, like from the gig?
  • Charlie: Yeah.
  • Jack: You mean like maybe those plastic swords that they stick through the olives and the onions?
  • Charlie: Oh, yeah like for the martinis that Mom packs in my lunch.
  • Jack: Oh, mom's making you martinis for lunch?
  • Charlie: I'm up to two now.
  • Jack: Oh, good.
  • Charlie: Two a day.
  • Jack: Good.
  • Charlie: Yep.
  • Jack: I brought you this.
  • [Gives him a harmonica]
  • Charlie: Whoa. One of your harmonicas?
  • Jack: Yep. That's one of my really old harmonicas.
  • Charlie: Sure you want me to have this?
  • Jack: Absolutely, I want you to have it.
  • Charlie: Where'd you get it?
  • Jack: Where'd I get it?
  • Jack: I got that from, uh... from an old famous blues player named Sonny Boy Wayne.
  • Charlie: Yeah, right.
  • Jack: I did.
  • Charlie: Sonny Boy Wayne.
  • Jack: The guy was like 9 ft tall and could play, man. There was like, a white light around him.

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