Python

It is quite rare in this world to come upon a stroke of pure genius such as Python. Superb acting, a plot with more turns than a meter stick, and the special effects...Oh the special effects. Lets just say that George Lucas better watch out cuz the lead animator of Python Kevin Little is on his ass! So what if Johnny from Karate Kid is in it. So what if their plan to kill the snake was as half assed as they come( the guy took his harness off to put another one on!). Who cares if they out ran a snake that supposedly goes 50mph on bikes...which they made sure to put their helmets on before riding. And the ending...The ending was pure cinematic genius. I mean a bike shop/bar. Why haven't I come up with this idea. I could sell bikes and drink beer at the same time. That's unbelievable. And she's pregnant! Hooray! What is that about huh? Is she having mutant half snake half Johnny from karate kid babies? Why do we need to know this! And six months? It took that douche six months to get this ugly beast in the sack! I mean come on. If they are gonna be casting a female lead would you pick this chick! They had Jenny McCarthy in the movie for 2 minutes ( which were excruciating by the way) and they have this hose beast in the lead female role. What up wit dat! This was atrocious!

Stay Black,

Jamal the Love Mule