- Steve Thompson: Aren't you kids forgetting what Christmas is all about?
- Allie Thompson: No, it's about presents.
- [Steve glares at her]
- Allie Thompson: Kidding.
- Allie Thompson: Trust me.
- Samantha Kwan: Any time you say 'trust me', I wind up either in detention or on a missing person's list.
- Sparky: Did you check your pockets?
- Santa Claus: [starts to check] I've been through this all before!
- Steve Thompson: These two guys gave me a ride from the airport, nice guys but they have the funniest names, Sparket and Crumpy.
- Allie Thompson: Crumpet and Sparky.
- Steve Thompson: How do you know that?
- Allie Thompson: Oh, it's a long story.
- Michelle Thompson: Allie is so excited about the snow you would think that she personally ordered it from the weather service.
- Allie Thompson: [making up her report] It's about William Shakespeare, and he wakes up now today, only nobody believes who he is. So he has to work so he gets a job flipping hamburgers and in between he writes a play called 'A Tale of Two Pickles' and...
- [bell rings]
- Ruben: Well, I better get home, I don't want to miss the excitement when the pipes burst.
- Michelle Thompson: Ruben, I really think you should stick around until the snow clears up.
- Ruben: Are you kidding? At this rate that could be the 4th of July.
- Allie Thompson: The antennas on the machine are pretty small and they're sending snow to San Fransisco, if we could extend the antenna with a coat hanger or something, we send the signals to outer space.
- Samantha Kwan: And cause a blizzard around the whole planet? We'll be responsible for the next Ice Age.
- Michelle Thompson: [after a brief earthquake] It's okay, it was just a truck passing.
- Ruben: Sure, that's what they said right before the big one of '46.
- Edwin Hadley: What did you say?
- Michelle Thompson: I asked if you'd like some coffee.
- Edwin Hadley: No, never touch the stuff. No wait, yes, I'd love some.
- Michelle Thompson: Okay... with sugar, cream?
- Edwin Hadley: Both, but I'll mix them myself out here. And if it's not too much trouble I'd like some cookies... candy... nuts... bowl of fruit, popcorn, toast, butter, maybe a pot roast.
- Michelle Thompson: Okay... I'll see what I can do.
- Edwin Hadley: Yams would be great.
- Michelle Thompson: Did you ever think we'd see a white Christmas in LA?
- Linda Kwan: No, maybe a brown one due to a mudslide but nothing like this. I'm gonna get my camera!
- Michelle Thompson: Well there is some good news. With all my canceled parties, we are going to have turkey sandwiches, for the next five years.
- Allie Thompson: [the garage door closes and plunges them into darkness] Sam, can you open that?
- Samantha Kwan: Open it? I can't even see it.
- [crashing noise]
- Samantha Kwan: Ow!
- Santa Claus: Ouch!
- Crumpet - the elf: Ow!
- Sparky: Ow!
- Allie Thompson: Sam, was that you?
- Samantha Kwan: Well, just the first one.
- [mechanic light flickers on, girls see Santa, they scream, he screams]
- Santa Claus: Not so fast Allie! You've got some explaining to do, Allison Rachel Thompson!
- Joey Thompson: [roasting marshmallows] So that's what this thing's for.
- Allie Thompson: That's why they call it a fireplace, Joey.
- Michelle Thompson: We should do this more often.
- Allie Thompson: Are you sure you have time for it?
- Michelle Thompson: Oh you kids make it sound like I'm always working.
- Joey Thompson, Allie Thompson: You *are*!
- Michelle Thompson: Well this is my busy season, you know that. But things will calm down now that the storm's over, it's over.