David Selby credited as playing...
Horace Vangilder
- [last lines]
- Missy Vanglider: Daddy, stop the car! Oh, my God!
- Letitia Vanglider: Oh, my God!
- Horace Vanglider: He's kissing his sister.
- Letitia Vanglider: That is open mouth!
- Horace Vanglider: 'Tis the season to be jolly, honey.
- Letitia Vanglider: Oh, God! Get us out of here!
- Horace Vanglider: Maybe they're trying to keep warm.
- Letitia Vanglider: Let's get out of here! Come on!
- Drew Latham: [trying to coax the Vangliders into staying] Wait a minute! There's more of Mom's Christmas buffet.
- Letitia Vanglider: If you think we're staying after that display, think again. Trollops who pose for dirty pictures, various incestuous overtones and old, unexplained men. This is without a doubt the worst Christmas I've...
- Horace Vanglider: [interrupts] Oh, shut up, Letitia!
- Letitia Vanglider: What?
- Horace Vanglider: I'll tell you what. I've put up with your high and mighty act for years but they don't have to. I don't remember you being superior when you got knocked up by Skippy Altsheller and then tricked me into marrying you.
- Missy Vanglider: [shocked at the revelation] Oh, my God!
- Horace Vanglider: I'm sorry, Missy.
- Letitia Vanglider: Missy, darling, it's not true. You were premature.
- Horace Vanglider: Oh, come on, Letitia!
- [looks at Drew]
- Horace Vanglider: Tell your mother thanks, Drew and Merry Christmas.