- [Mikael Tornving is imitating a German interrogation leader]
- Henrik Schyffert: What should we do to increase the interest for the Swedish language?
- Mikael Tornving: We shall punish all those who are talking... what are you saying?
- Henrik Schyffert: I was asking how we could increase the interest for the Swedish la...
- Mikael Tornving: You're talking about the interest for the Swedish language, are you not?
- Henrik Schyffert: Yes.
- Mikael Tornving: Sit straight when I'm talking to you, and look me in the eyes. You have a very suspicious mind, you know that?
- Henrik Schyffert: Sorry?
- Mikael Tornving: You should be clear of what you are saying, you are contradicting yourself!
- Henrik Schyffert: You are obviously talking English...
- Mikael Tornving: SILENCE!
- Henrik Schyffert: You are obviously talking English with a German touch...
- Mikael Tornving: YOU ARE A LICE!
- Henrik Schyffert: Why shouldn't you place bananas close to other fruit?
- Mikael Tornving: Well, they have nothing to talk about. It's the shallowest damn fruit of them all... it doesn't need to learn conversation with it's shape, it just lies there...
- Henrik Schyffert: Bananas release a gas, which make the other fruits grow too quickly.
- Johan Wahlström: Banana gas...
- Henrik Schyffert: The hazardous banana gas is spreading!
- Mikael Tornving: WÖÖÖ! WÖÖÖ! WÖÖÖ! WÖÖÖ! Don't panic: Banana gas alert!
- [Mikael Tornving simulates covering up windows with duct tape]
- Mikael Tornving: My son... whatever you do, my boy, watch out for the banana gas! It took your grand-dad, and it almost took me...
- Anders S Nilsson: Vote Red for Blue... what the hell am I saying?
- Osama bin Laden: I don't like that song "Hi, it's Nick-click"; it makes my beard go right up. Sorry about AIK, by the way.
- Henrik Hjelt: A lot of people see Bush as a stupid cowboy. I see him more like Manuel in "Fawlty Towers".