The Curse of El Charro

Quentin Tarentino and Robert Rodriguez tried (I'd say, with mixed success) to honor the history of grindhouse movies -- low budget movies shot with gonzo velocities and lots of cleavers & cleavage.

What Tarentino and Rodriguez tried to celebrate from their mink-lined, gold-plated director chairs, these guys did all by their loathsome lonesome, and cranked out El Charro. A masterpiece? No - not by a long shot. But, you know, it does have all the hallmarks of grindhouse: barely comprehensible plotting, bizarre riffs from the periphery, cars on desert highways, bad dialog, bad cops, bad bars, some nonsense about curses, babbling priests, buckets of blood, a couple hundred f-bombs, and (duh) topless women.

If you're looking for El Charro to introduce you to next round of cinematic genius, you'll be sorely disappointed. But, if you've been hankering for some drive-in quality, B-movie slasher junk -- then why the hell not?

(The soundtrack kind of kicks a--, by the way).

I have watched some of the worsts wastes of film in my time but this is by far the very worst. Too bad the director and producer weren't among the victims so that we could have been spared this travesty to film making. The movie made absolutely no sense. The sound director didn't appear to know what they were doing. This movie was definitely done on the cheap since the lighting and the sound both were sub-standard, considering that the actors and actresses were all unknowns there should have been more than ample money to hire people to properly do the sound and lighting. The next time that the investors decide to invest in a movie I hope they remember how pitiful this one was and decide against it.

The Curse of El Charro is about a girl who sees visions about her sister's suicide. Apparently Charro is punishment for the girl's family for something her ancestors did. It wasn't easily discernible because the film was not that interesting to watch. She goes on a trip with some back stabbing friends, and everyone is attacked by El Charro. Her persistent dreams give away the film. The characters have no redeeming qualities and there is nothing that gives this film any reason to be viewed other than it is there to be watched. Some of the cinematography is interesting, but the film flips around between flashback, Charro, and the star. If you're looking for some mindless slashing, this film is for you.

In California, Maria (Andrew Mia) has awful nightmares with and visions of her sister that committed suicide one year ago. Her roommate Chris (Heidi Androl) invites Maria to travel with her and her friends Tanya (Kathryn Taylor) and Rose (KellyDawn Malloy) on vacation to her uncle's house in Saguaro, Arizona, to relax. When the group arrives in the house, they immediately go to a night-club to have fun and chase some local guys for sex; however, the evil El Charro (Andrew Bryniarski) is seeking Maria killing her friends with his machete.

The slasher "The Curse of El Charro" is a gore mess. The characters in general are unpleasant and I do not understand how the four girls could take a road trip together: Maria is a deranged woman; Tanya is an amoral slut; Rose is a lesbian drug dealer; only Chris seems to be an average person. The screenplay is awful, and in the beginning, Maria is confessing her nightmares to a priest that seems to know something about her fate. Then, a group of young women from California that seems to be in a permanent heat goes to a desert place in the middle of nowhere to drink booze, use drugs and have sex with hillbilly strangers, in a totally weird and unusual situation. The creepy El Charro kills every character with his machete without any further explanation. The conclusion seems to indicate that the insane Maria actually killed her friends, but it not clear. My vote is three.

Title (Brazil): "A Maldição de el Charro" ("The Curse of El Charro")

El Charro opens up in a fairly interesting way, leading me to believe it was some sort of religious supernatural thriller. However these themes are pushed aside, and not really developed. Later the group of friends run into a creepy Sheriff, who escorts them to bar, filled with assorted weirdos, including a wheel chair bound death metal rocker, suffering from some kind of mental handicap. At this point I'm thinking the film is going to become a Devil's Rejects, or Texas Chainsaw Massacre insane family type of film. No again, they simply leave the bar, and the Sheriff, and his wacky pals are never developed beyond that. Seriously, the writer or somebody has really messed up here, the film is a jumbled mess, and I can't begin to imagine where they went wrong. The film doesn't know what it wants to be, one minute it's going for the intense dramatic angle with a girl coping with the suicide of her sister, the next it features snore inducing stereotypes trying to party, and get laid. Finally by the end, it decides to go the slasher route, but it's far to late. I rate this a two, because I know some of the actors' are better then the material, and there are a couple decent kill scenes in the end, though nothing special. For those of you wondering, there is a brief lesbian shower scene with Tabitha Stevens, but it lasts all of three seconds, and you don't see much of anything. On a side note, Lemmy what were you thinking? You have to stick with Troma man, you were great in Tromeo And Juliet, but this garbage is beneath you.