- Onsokumaru: What the hell are we, trash? I wanna take a bath! Shinobu! Kaede! Where are you?!
- Sasuke: Hey Onsokumaru, do you think we're burnable or non-burnable garbage?
- Onsokumaru: I'm pretty sure we'll burn.
- Sasuke: Huh.
- Sasuke: Who goes there!? Huh, I could have sworn I heard someone.
- Onsokumaru: Heh. You fool, what do you take me for? If there had been someone outside, don't you think *I* would have noticed. I'll do a lap around Japan on a unicycle without a *seat* if I'm wrong.
- Sasuke: Seriously? That's great. I'll write up the contract.
- Onsokumaru: Woo-hoo! Shop until you drop! Clothing accessories, illegal porn tapes and high school girls! So where do you think we should start?
- Sasuke: Hey, hey, hey! You're a little too happy. You're babbling about illegal purchases.
- Shinobu: Now, now. Let's not fight while we're eating. My sundae's gone but would either of you like to taste my delicious, sweet cherry?
- Shinobu: Hey now. Onsokumaru, stop bothering everyone. You're such a bad boy.
- Onsokumaru: Excuse me? Some breasts, a few sweet-and-sours kisses and a roomful of farts is *bad*? A *real* ninja must be prepared to face dangers such as these at all times.
- Kaede Shiranui: I so don't understand him.
- Kaede Shiranui: You're *in* the way.
- Onsokumaru: *This* is where *we* always play baseball! Besides, girls shouldn't even be in sports. Except maybe as cheerleaders, eye candy or beer girls.
- Kaede Shiranui: What a tyrant. Unbelievable.
- Onsokumaru: Me, a tyrant? What an incredibly rude thing to say. To make it up to me, let me touch your boobs.
- Onsokumaru: Stop laughin' will ya and just trust me. You'll live longer if you bathe with men.
- Miyabi: Really? Is that true, sis?
- Shinobu: Uh, is that true, Kaede?
- Kaede Shiranui: I've never heard of such a bizarre theory.
- Ninja 2: Ah, yes ladies, it's quite true. We've even got a letter from the Surgeon General saying so. Actually, it's really from my uncle Kazuhiko whom everyone calls Pervyhiko and I'm not sure why, though.
- Onsokumaru: Well, it appears that you leave me no choice. Round up the men. We're going to have a guys versus girls baseball game. We'll turn those insolent girls into squishy-wishy sobbing babies.
- Sasuke: All right! A new strike zone!
- Ninja 1: That's a homerun for the girl's team!
- Onsokumaru: Stop! Now wait just a minute here!
- Ninja 1: What? You have a problem with my judgement as the umpire? Assistant umpire, *that's* a penalty.
- Ninja 3: Yes sir!
- Ninja 2: Well, look at this. It looks like the assistant umpire has made a stick to shove up his butt.
- Onsokumaru: Dah, those stubby branches look like they'd be incredibly comfortable but, uh...
- Ninja 2: Onsokumaru does not look too pleased with that penalty.
- Onsokumaru: What is this?
- Shinobu: Huh?
- Onsokumaru: I wonder what's in here.
- Kaede Shiranui: Hey! Leave it alone. That's the Christmas present I brought.
- Onsokumaru: Oh wow, ten kiss tickets! I see some deep and heavy smooching in my future. It's so dirty. It's so filthy. I had no idea this person was such a pervert. Here ladies, this is a present I'd like to give you.
- Kaede Shiranui: Yeah, yeah. Thanks but no thanks.
- Shinobu: You're *amazing* Miyabi. You're so smart.
- Ninja 2: Smarter than us.
- Onsokumaru: I knew that! I knew that! And there's something *else* I know. Men are pointy and women are soft. They like to purr and go 'Meow.' So here I come baby! Come and get some fresh milk! You want it!
- Ninja 1: Really, because I always kind of thought that, too.
- Onsokumaru: Hmm, what's that?
- Ninja 3: Ow! Ah! That's my butt!
- Kaede Shiranui: It's been fun, but can you guys please leave now?
- Sasuke: Did you hear that, Onsokumaru? What a terrible order. I can't believe how rude she is.
- Onsokumaru: No, I couldn't understand her at all, actually. Apparently, this village only seems to speak the language of selfish priss.
- Onsokumaru: You know, you're just as bad as the instant cup ramen leftovers that get stuck in the drain after I empty out the hot water.
- Sasuke: Really? That bad?
- Shinobu: Wow, you're so amazing, Kaede. And you know what? You've just earned yourself a whole bunch of stamps on the stamp card inside my heart.
- Kaede Shiranui: Great, but what's all this about a stamp card?
Contribute to this page
Suggest an edit or add missing content
