Jack Black: Nacho

Nacho Libre

Nacho

Nacho: I'm not listening to you! You only believe in Science. That's probably why we never win!
Esqueleto: We never win because you are fat!

Sister Encarnación: Where are your robes, Ignacio?
Nacho: They were... stinky. These are my recreational clothes.
Sister Encarnación: They look expensive.
Nacho: Thank you. I mean... they might have the appearance of riches, but beneath the clothes, we find a man... and beneath the man we find... his... nucleus.
Sister Encarnación: Nucleus?

Nacho: Chancho. When you are a man, sometimes you wear stretchy pants in your room. It's for fun.

Señor Ramon: What is this?
Nacho: Leftovers. Enjoy.
Señor Ramon: There is no flavor. There are no spices. Where are the chips?
Nacho: Somebody stole them.
Señor Ramon: Did you not tell them that they were the Lord's chips?
Nacho: I was trying to!
Señor Ramon: You are useless Ignacio!
Elderly Monk: Silence brothers! This is the worst lunch I ever had.
Señor Ramon: Your only job is to cook. Do you not realize I have had diarrhea since Easters?
Nacho: Ok... Maybe I am not meant for these duties. Cooking duty. Dead guy duty. Maybe it's time for me to get a better duty!

Nacho: When the fantasy has ended/and all the children are gone/Something good inside me/helps me to carry on/I ate some bugs/I ate some grass/I used my hand to wipe my tears/To kiss your mouth/I break my vows/no no no no no no way Jose/Unless you want to/Then we break our vows together.

Nacho: [signing letter to Sister Encarnacion] Hug hug, kiss kiss, hug hug, big kiss, little hug, kiss kiss, little kiss.

Nacho: I am a-singing at the party / I am singing it's my turn to sing at this party / Everyone is dancing, happy party / But Ramses is not dancing he does not dance at the parties / Ramses' number one he knows the secret of desire / Ramses is the one, he puts the people all on fire.

Nacho: Those eggs were a lie, Steven. A LIE! They give me no eagle powers! They give me no nutrients!
Esqueleto: Sorry.
Nacho: I don't want to get paid to lose. I wanna win!

Nacho: I'm a little concerned right now. About... your salvation and stuff. How come you have not been baptized?
Esqueleto: Because I never got around to it ok? I dunno why you always have to be judging me because I only believe in science.

Nacho: Ok. Orphans! Listen to Ignacio. I know it is fun to wrestle. A nice piledrive to the face... or a punch to the face... but you cannot do it. Because, it is in the Bible not to wrestle your neighbour.
Chancho: So you've never wrestled?
Nacho: Me? No. Come on. Don't be crazy. I know the wrestlers get all the fancy ladies, and the clothes, and the fancy creams and lotions. But my life is good! Really good! I get to wake up every morning, at 5AM, and make some soup! It's the best. I love it. I get to lay in a bed, all by myself, all of my life! That's fantastic! Go. Go away! Read some books!

Nacho: I was wondering if you would like to join me in my quarters this night... for some toast.

Sister Encarnación: Ignacio, I have been looking all over for you, where have you been?
Nacho: I have been here. I have been sleeping.
Sister Encarnación: In a frilly shirt and slacks?
Nacho: They are my PJ's

Sister Encarnación: Can I come in?
Nacho: No, people might get the wrong idea about you... Like maybe you are a floozy.

Sister Encarnación: Well, my favorite color is light tan. My favourite animal is puppies. I like serving the Lord. Hiking, play volleyball...
Nacho: You gotta be kidding me. Everything you just said, is MY favourite thing to do, every day!

Nacho: Do you remember when everyone was shouting my name, and I used my strength to rip my blouse.
Esqueleto: Yea, and I saw them knock you unconscious, ok?

Nacho: Precious Father, why have you given me this desire to wrestle and then made me such a stinky warrior?