Pirates

I am a woman who has always enjoyed the occasional porn movie for the pure, well, arousal factor. ;-) However far too many put my hubby over the top and left me unsatisfied. This one was nearly perfect. It has enough storyline to keep you interested (we wanted to finish watching this one to see how it ended) but in respect to the fact that it's main purpose is to be pornography - it doesn't make you wait too long between hot scenes. The acting is not about to win an Oscar, but as many others pointed out - IT'S PORN! Even with that in mind, I believe many of these actors did a fine job of the acting required of them in between the sex scenes. I believed Captain Victor was so blood thirsty he would kill a Priest and his own lover/first mate to get what he wants. I did enjoy the comedic angles as well.

All in all this movie is certainly a HUGE step in the direction of the kind of porn couples want, and dare I say need, to spice up their love lives. Look at the number of women who commented here on this film - women are watching porn and have money to rent and/or buy if they can find porn like this that gives us what we need.

I love film, I really do. It fascinates me to see, literally see what works.

Porn baffles me, because it is so popular. Oh, there's porn films from the 70s that really impress, some of them. And you'll often stumble across really intelligent films made by folks with clever ideas that could only get funded if there is panting and jizz in them.

But the modern stuff is just plain boring, visually and every other way. The only porn film I've seen in the modern era that impressed me was "Fashionistas" and that really did. It was actually a movie (a good one) and porn (S&M) where the two blended well. So I anticipated this with some rather high expectations.

And I was partly rewarded. The writing is very clever, with some great lines. One actor alone in this (Evan Stone) is good, but he is very good, on the level of the pros in theater films. With a little bit of attention, this could have been a good movie and maybe even a hit.

The blonds (all blonds!) all looked and acted the same, having gotten their boobs at the same store. Ho hum. Seen one saucersized aureole, you seen em all.

But here's the thing. Porn movies like this follow the model of movie musicals (based on stage musicals). That's where the story chugs along until hitting a tripwire. Then reality shifts and you enter a song, which may have some relationship to the story or not. But the main point is reality shifts. Then it shifts back and the people on the street stop being a chorus and again become passers by.

Same with porn like this. The story chugs along until it is time for sex. But this isn't sex between people. It isn't real sex at all, instead a sort of performance, a display put on for the audience like a song. The same sorts of limits apply, even the same time periods. There's a standard vocabulary: this and then this and then that. Only in this case, the sex has nothing much to do with the story; the story is presumably something to entertain you in between titillations.

Oh well. Give Even his due. He acts, and it even carries over to what he does with his member. I wish him well.

Ted's Evaluation -- 1 of 3: You can find something better to do with this part of your life.

I'm not writing this to tell the story, but in a few words, there is actually a storyline in this movie. And a good one, not like those movies Private releases. To be completely honest, if they removed every porn action in this movie (like they seem to have done in the R-rated version), this would still be very watchable, even if the sex was completely removed. There is good humor, a good story, some pretty good special effects (considering the budget for the movie was 1 million dollars and that is porn). Did you know that these actors could actually act? Of course, it would not be the best movie ever, but since this is porn, I can say that it is the best porn movie ever done. My girlfriend enjoyed it as much as I did, and she does not usually enjoy porn. Great movie for couples.

The only bad thing about it: the fake breasts. I do not think there is ONE girl with natural breasts. So go rent it or buy it (the DVD set comes with three discs: movie, movie high definition and Extras), it will not let you down.

This summer I've been working at an adult film store as a clerk and I must say we can't keep this movie on the shelf. People who mention the bad acting must have never seen a porn in their lives. With the weakest (acting) performance given by Jesse Jane, Evan Stone's character was spot on. I recommend this movie to everyone who hasn't seen it, and again to those that have. Having a background in digital animation I was surprised to see how well compositing was done. Great special effects especially considering the target market. The hardest part to get used to was watching the sex scenes accompanied by a full music score. Two thumbs (and a candlestick) way up!

To call this film groundbreaking, for me, it must have very good scores in five areas: 1.Costumes/make-up 2. Sets/ambiance 3. Special effects / lighting 4. Sexual heat 5. Acting

Groundbreaking would have been for the director to provide his performers with acting lessons and on-set coaches. IMO that would have fused together the good costumes/sets/special effects/sexual interaction with that which most porn lacks--good acting. The budget was there, so to have a coach would have made it better for many of the actors who found themselves on unfamiliar ground, compared to other movies they've made.

Much better than any other so-called "ground breaking effort" by other film companies.

Janine did a great job, so did Ewan Stone. The Chinese guy was hilarious, although quite flat and wooden with his delivery. All the sex scenes were good.