- Arnold Brown: We had the other difficulty in Glasgow of my father being a teetotaller. And the shame on Saturday nights of him being constantly thrown into pubs.
- Richard Dangerous: We'd like to open this evening with a little joke.
- Adrian Dangerous: A joke?
- Richard Dangerous: Joke.
- Adrian Dangerous: Knock, knock!
- Richard Dangerous: Who's there?
- Adrian Dangerous: Open the door!
- Richard Dangerous: Open the...
- [off microphone]
- Richard Dangerous: What the fuck are you talking about?
- Alexei Sayle: Jean-Paul Sartre, what a fucking cunt, eh? What a fucking cunt. We hate him round our way. You know why? You know why? 'Cos he knows fuck all about a Cortina, that's why.