- Jesse Katsopolis: D. J., what do you see over there?
- D.J. Tanner: A coat rack.
- Jesse Katsopolis: No, it's a big, beautiful Christmas tree. Joseph, what do you see back there?
- Joey Gladstone: Vending machines.
- Jesse Katsopolis: No. I see a Christmas dinner with all the trimmings. Pop, what do you see back there?
- Nick Katsopolis: A conveyer belt.
- Jesse Katsopolis: No. I see... Okay, yes. That's a conveyor belt.
- Jesse Katsopolis: What's the matter with you people? The first Christmas was in a manger. They did okay. So what if we're stuck in this crummy dump? Christmas isn't about presents, or Santa Clause, or cows. It's about a feeling. It's about... it's about people. It's about us forgetting about our problems and reaching out to help other people. Christmas doesn't have to happen in one certain place. It happens in our hearts. So if you think about it, we can have Christmas anywhere, even in a baggage claim!
- Nick Katsopolis: Rebecca's a nice girl. Very pretty. You two would make a wonderful couple.
- Jesse Katsopolis: Yeah, I've tried, Pop. She just wants to be friends. She's one of those girls that... her career comes first.
- Nick Katsopolis: I understand that girls' lib stuff but uh... you got to tell 'em who's boss.
- Jesse Katsopolis: Christmas isn't about presents or Santa Clause or cows, it's about a feeling. It's about people. It's about us forgetting about our problems and reaching out to help other people. Christmas doesn't have to happen in one certain place, it happens in our hearts.