- Roger Ebert: There are scenes in "Dirty Love" so tasteless, I can't even describe them. No, honest. I can't. I'm thinking of the pool on the supermarket floor. Yeah, that one. The movie is not only bad, it's incompetent, and embarrassing, and anyone in the audience, I'd say ANYONE, can make a better movie than that.
- Roger Ebert: Coming up next, Richard and I both name the two worst films of 2005, and if you still think Daisy Dukes are in style, or you happen to be a gigolo, you may want to leave the room now.