Bone Eater

I'm not really sure where to begin. From start to finish, bad, stinky bad, like stepping into a port-a-john on a 100 degree day. If you force yourself to watch this as I did, keep some Vicodin handy for the pain. I will never understand how flicks this bad make it past the cutting room without the entire reel ending up on the floor. The movie is a cross between Gumby rides Pokey, meets the terminator, meets Wally Beaver playing cowboys and Indians without the cowboys. I've seen better animation in the original cut of the Blob. You will get more entertainment from watching Gone with the Wind while suffering from the puke and poops. Bad acting and hokey lines will have you squirming and wishing you had rented Peewee's big Top or watched every episode of Gilligan's Island back to back. UGH..I'm going to go slit my wrist now.

All I can do is laugh. Wow. I like Jim Wynorski's movies, I really do. I mean, Chopping Mall is a classic. But this, what happened to this guy? He used to make funny horror movies, that tried to be good. But this was hardly even funny...I mean, I guess it was, because I laughed. The villain is incredible. I mean, horrible CGI. It looks...terrible. And the movie has no gore, and no nudity as redeeming qualities. It is rated PG-13. A movie named "Bone Eater" you know won't be a blockbuster movie, you know it probably won't have a smart script. A movie like this may rely on gore...but no. It doesn't rely on anything really, it's just...crap. Check it out if you want to laugh, though. But don't expect a good movie. I hope Jim Wynorski goes back to movies like Chopping Mall and Ghoulies IV, because this and Komodo Vs. Cobra ain't cutting it.

Following an accident at a local dig, a local sheriff finds that the series of incidents around town are the result of a released Native American demon through the construction project and must find a way of stopping its rampage through town.

This one wasn't all that bad of an effort but did have some flaws to it. Among the few good parts here is the relatively high body count featured here that really makes for quite a fun time here as there's a lot of rather enjoyable encounters throughout. The opening resurrection at the site where it massacres the workers is quite fun, as well as the sequence where it takes out the archaeological diggers, the ambush at the side road where it gets the couple by their truck and another rather fun attack as it appears and takes out a series of guards while dealing with the workers and the local tribe at the construction site which is quite fun with the mystical incantations against it as all of these scenes are really enjoyable. There's also the rather fun scenes here with the spirit chasing after the dirt-bikers on a ghostly steed across the desert dunes and a latter high-speed chase down the highway which is highly fun, cheesy action scenes that gives this some fun action moments. As well, the creature here could've been quite fun here as this has some potentially enjoyable aspects here with its imposing appearance made of bones assembled into a fine-looking beast complete with a crown of bones as well as some fine weaponry, a really unique and inventive backstory that ties it into the area and a pretty clever way of finally dealing with it for a pretty nice main creature here and ends up being what holds it up over the several flaws here. Among the film's biggest issues here is the fact that there's absolutely no blood or gore here as the creature's attacks are never given to include the chance for any by being portrayed as him disintegrating them into a cloud of mass. There's a speculation that it's turning the victims into bones but just vaporizing them into a vapor of smoke isn't that appealing anyway trying to showcase this, and given the high body count there's some chances here to really have had some fun with the creature like this and it's wholly disappointing. Another big flaw here is the lame and utterly ridiculous CGI on display, which is used on the creature to make it so cheap and unconvincing that despite the cool-looking appearance it comes off laughable that it was allowed to pass through and completed here as it's simply a non-stop series of the usually- associated tropes of the style. The only other part here that holds this back is the totally unrealistic and over-the-top manner of the businessman's attitude towards the tribe which borders on ludicrous with how he expects what's happening to the relics left there that are continually being dug up, forcing more to hide. Otherwise, this one was quite decent.

Rated PG-13: Violence and some Language.

Even without knowing what I was in for here, aside from "Bone Eater" being a horror movie, then of course I opted to watch it as I had the chance here in 2025. Given my love of all things horror, of course I needed no persuasion to check out the movie.

Writers Jim Wynorski and William Langlois put together a fair enough script. I mean, it was straightforward and enjoyable enough for the campy contents that it was. But you're not in for any grand horror experience here.

There were a couple of familiar faces on the cast list, such as Bruce Boxleitner, Michael Horse, Walter Koenig, Jim Storm and William Katt. The acting performances in the movie were fair.

The effects in the movie looked like they were straight out of a mid-1990s computer game. It was downright embarrassing to look at, especially since it was made in 2007.

"Bone Eater" is not a movie that I would recommend for any horror fan to rush out and get to watch. But if you enjoy campy horror movies with poor CGI, then this is something for you.

My rating of director Jim Wynorski's 2007 movie "Bone Eater" lands on a generous three of ten stars.

A great cast, a fantastic CGI monster and a brilliant script. If this film had had any of those things then it might not have been amongst the worst films I've ever wasted an hour and a half on. Infinite chimpanzees with infinite typewriters have not yet written the complete works of Shakespeare but along the way this has appeared in their waste-paper bin and somehow it got made into a movie. You can tell the the actors regret signing those contracts with every word they mutter directly into camera. The CGI is amateurish in the extreme and they might have created more tension of the cast had been attacked with the Sinclair Spectrum it was created on. I wanted to like this film, it has nice cameo appearances by Gil Gerard and Walter Koenig so I expected a fun horror movie that didn't take itself too seriously. It actually does try to take itself seriously but is about as much fun as trip to the dentist. Do yourself a favour. Don't watch this movie, you'll only encourage them to make more.