- Celene: So Alberta?
- Alberta: Uh-huh?
- Celene: Last night, when you told me about the guys beating on your friend and you running away...
- Alberta: Yes?
- Celene: You, um, you forgot to mention the part where you stole 20 grand from them.
- Alberta: Yes, I did. Sorry. Coffee?
- Celene: And that you stashed it in my home. Black, thank you.
- Alberta: Again, sorry.
- Celene: And that they had a way of finding you, and busting--
- [she looks over to Rene in the other room who is tied up in a chair and has duct tape over his mouth]
- Celene: you're paying for that vase, ass fuck!
- [back to Alberta]
- Celene: What I'm saying here is that you didn't exactly tell me everything. You might find it nitpicky, but to me, having prior knowledge these things would fall under the the category of "good to know."
- Alberta: I totally agree. And Celene... it won't happen again.
- Celene: [Celene giggles] You-- you said that when you were seven and I caught you eating cat food.
- Rene: [Alberta turns on the light switch and gasps] That prosciutto may be a little off. Good hiding, by the way. A real crackerjack. Who would have ever dreamt it'd be under your bead?
- [Alberta tries to run away but he grabs her]
- Alberta: Aah!
- [he pushes her into a chair]
- Rene: It's funny. Paul called you Celene. Smart move lying to him. I mean, who the hell would want to be dominated by an Alberta? Did you honestly think I wouldn't find you?
- Alberta: Oh my God. I think this is bleach.
- [Celene comes home]
- Celene: [to Spencer in hallway] Spencer, what did I tell you about not hanging up your jacket?
- [Celene walks into the laundry room]
- Alberta: Celene? I'm really sorry. I didn't know that was gonna happen. I- I Look, just tell me how much it cost. I'll pay you back.
- Celene: $800, and I need to wear this for an appointment tonight. Jesus, don't insult me, thinking you can come up with that scratch for attire.
- [pounds fist]
- Celene: God!
- Alberta: It's just one appointment though, right?
- Celene: Yeah, one that happens to coincide with some very big bills that need to be paid tomorrow.
- Alberta: I'm sorry, I'll make it up to you, I swear. I just -- I just didn't know your hooker outfits cost so much.
- Celene: What did you just call me?
- Spencer: [listening in] Hooker. I heard hooker.
- [Celeneshe slaps Spencer]
- Celene: I'm doing what I want, and you have the nerve to call -- you wreck my shit and then label me-- you've really changed Alberta. Not at all the fuckup I remember.