Hero

Mission Impossible but with the worst writing. While I was watching this movie I had feeling that I'm wasting my time and in the end this feeling came true. Don't watch this movie. Instead you can go and watch some Adam Sandler movie 'cause they are less dumb and annoying.

First, the good: some of the scenery and photography was very nice. That's about it. Everything else was pretty bad. The entire plot was super weak and almost felt made up as you went along. The dialog was terrible. The English dubbing wasn't great, but I don't think improving the delivery could make up for the conic book like dialog. A lot of the scenery and quality of the visuals were good, but then even that was ruined by too much scene chopping and utterly annoying tendency to shoot at random angles for no reason. I did consider just bailing after 15 minutes, but couldn't help but keep watching just to see if the entire movie could really be so bad. The answer is yes.

I couldn't help but think that this film is an attempt to cram as many cringey cliches (which even Hollywood has long since abandoned) into one production as possible. The movie just feels like a parody, where everything is said and done just for the sake of recreating what you once saw in another, better film.

The editing is outright nauseating - just pay attention to the amount of cuts in any scene.

While the CGI is terrible (just look at the skydiving scene with the pasted-in faces), thankfully there's not too much of it.

The music is nice at times, but leaves you absolutely exhausted as it NEVER stops. Not for one solid minute. One of the numerous strange choices in this film.

This movie's biggest problem is probably its writing. You keep asking yourself "Who is this?" There are like 5 attractive young women with a ponytail who look identical in this film.

Everything is all over the place.

The scenic photography is the best thing about this...but you can get good photography, sweeping vistas, charming European cities in many films. But, yeah, the DP did a good job. The plot was very confusing. If the baddies wanted to get info from the hero, why were they also trying to kill him all the time? It still wasn't clear who the all the bad guys were and how they were connected, and if the payoff was 100 million Euro--that's about 10% of Selena Gomez' wealth...all that for 100 million? Of course a major problem is that the film was spoken in Russian and dubbed in English. Maybe if I lived in Moscow, I'd rate this higher. Maybe. My TV gave me the subtitles along with the dubbing, but the dubbing was very awkward and the subtitles were often awkwaard. Worse, the dubbed speakers were expressionless in the worst ways. It sounded like some folks off the street just reading the lines. As a result, it is difficult to gauge the quality of the acting, since the dubbing was as bad as Kung Fu movies from the 1970's. It was almost painful to watch, except for the really nice scenery.

The description of the film was. "Agent Action in the footsteps of the Jasen Bourne series", by the way. Under no circumstances can it get there. Little action, funny story.