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The Machine

  • 2023
  • R
  • 1h 52m
IMDb RATING
5.7/10
18K
YOUR RATING
Mark Hamill, Bert Kreischer, Robert Maaser, Iva Babic, and Jimmy Tatro in The Machine (2023)
Trailer 1
Play trailer2:11
8 Videos
82 Photos
ActionComedy

Bert's drunken past catches up with him 20 years down the road when he and his father are kidnapped by those Bert wronged 20 years ago while drunk on a college semester abroad in Russia.Bert's drunken past catches up with him 20 years down the road when he and his father are kidnapped by those Bert wronged 20 years ago while drunk on a college semester abroad in Russia.Bert's drunken past catches up with him 20 years down the road when he and his father are kidnapped by those Bert wronged 20 years ago while drunk on a college semester abroad in Russia.

  • Director
    • Peter Atencio
  • Writers
    • Bert Kreischer
    • Kevin Biegel
    • Scotty Landes
  • Stars
    • Bert Kreischer
    • Mark Hamill
    • Jimmy Tatro
  • See production info at IMDbPro
  • IMDb RATING
    5.7/10
    18K
    YOUR RATING
    • Director
      • Peter Atencio
    • Writers
      • Bert Kreischer
      • Kevin Biegel
      • Scotty Landes
    • Stars
      • Bert Kreischer
      • Mark Hamill
      • Jimmy Tatro
    • 163User reviews
    • 36Critic reviews
    • 37Metascore
  • See production info at IMDbPro
  • Videos8

    Official Trailer
    Trailer 2:17
    Official Trailer
    The Machine
    Trailer 2:18
    The Machine
    The Machine
    Trailer 2:18
    The Machine
    The Machine
    Trailer 2:11
    The Machine
    The Machine: Preparing To Become An Action Star (Featurette)
    Featurette 1:05
    The Machine: Preparing To Become An Action Star (Featurette)
    The Machine: Not A Documentary (Vignette)
    Featurette 0:55
    The Machine: Not A Documentary (Vignette)
    The Machine: Director Peter Atencio (Featurette)
    Featurette 1:02
    The Machine: Director Peter Atencio (Featurette)

    Photos81

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    Top cast49

    Edit
    Bert Kreischer
    Bert Kreischer
    • Bert
    Mark Hamill
    Mark Hamill
    • Albert
    Jimmy Tatro
    Jimmy Tatro
    • Young Bert
    Iva Babic
    Iva Babic
    • Irina
    Robert Maaser
    Robert Maaser
    • Alexei
    Stephanie Kurtzuba
    Stephanie Kurtzuba
    • LeeAnn
    Martyn Ford
    Martyn Ford
    • Sponge
    Jess Gabor
    Jess Gabor
    • Sasha
    • (as Jessica Gabor)
    Rita Bernard-Shaw
    Rita Bernard-Shaw
    • Ashley
    • (as Rita Bernard Shaw)
    Nikola Djuricko
    • Igor
    • (as Nikola Duricko)
    Oleg Taktarov
    Oleg Taktarov
    • Train Igor
    Amelie Child Villiers
    Amelie Child Villiers
    • Tatiana
    • (as Amelie Villiers)
    Aleksandar Sreckovic
    Aleksandar Sreckovic
    • Fedor
    Jovan Savic
    • Irina's Father
    • (as Jovan Lole Savic)
    Marko Nedeljkovic
    • Young Igor
    Set Sjöstrand
    Set Sjöstrand
    • Vanya
    • (as Set Sjostrand)
    Mercedes De La Cruz
    Mercedes De La Cruz
    • Teacher
    Vladimir Gvojic
    Vladimir Gvojic
    • Train Banditti #1
    • Director
      • Peter Atencio
    • Writers
      • Bert Kreischer
      • Kevin Biegel
      • Scotty Landes
    • All cast & crew
    • Production, box office & more at IMDbPro

    User reviews163

    5.717.5K
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    Featured reviews

    6theprodigynerd

    I really wanted to like this

    I really wanted to like this movie and I didn't hate it per se, but it was not what the trailer made it out to be. I am a huge fan of comedy/action movies like The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent but this one didn't quite fit the bill. The set up took way too long. I spent the first probably hour and fifteen minutes thinking meh I could leave and wouldn't care if I didn't see the end. It hit its stride in the middle and then tied everything together but not in the most satisfying way. The main character arc seemed a little abrupt and not so much earned. Mark Hamil was not used correctly. He did the best with what he was given and it seemed like a film he would have enjoyed making but his comedy was a little forced. The best part of this film was definitely the end, when the comedy reached its peak. The action was very fun to watch on the big screen but other than that if you've seen the trailer you've seen the best comedy it has to offer.
    7anthonyroskoski

    Good also Funny, But Not Amazing

    The movie itself was pretty funny for the most part. I would also agree that it was a little slow at times too. Burt performing on-stage is truly authentic and amazingly funny. For a 1st time actor, I thought he did really well. Some have rated this movie with low scores forgetting that this is a stand-up comedian acting in a major motion picture about his life and never experiencing the acting role before. If you hated this movie and decided to post negative remarks and ratings, I cannot relate. I have read some of these negative reviews and it is clear that some people believe that they themselves are Siskle & Ebert themselves. The movie is funny, was it the best comedy I have ever seen NO. But to bash a movie just because it wasn't your cup of tea is an insult to reviews as a whole. When I dislike something, I simply choose to remember the morales my mother and father taught me as a young child. I keep my opinions and negative thoughts to myself. Go see the movie, it's pretty funny.
    6rameses-86633

    Exactly what you'd expect

    I think 6/10 is very fair here. It's not a great movie, and that's ok. If you like Brent Chrysler, you'll be entertained by this movie. I can see why he was so happy with how the movie turned out, it's just all him being something he's not for two hours (which again, is fine!). I can tell this was really just something that everyone involved with had a lot of fun with, from the actors to the editors with those kitschy transitions and strange Russian subtitles. It's quirky, and I think it works here.

    Mark Hamill was a crazy get for this movie and I can't believe he agreed to do it. It definitely helped the movie's case. Jimmy Tatro was a good casting for young Bert as well.

    One observation to make- Bert's character in this is literally Po from Kung Fu Panda. It's just a fat guy who dumb lucks his way through everything until the very end when his actions seem a bit more intentional and he accepts who he really is inside.
    5t-d-t-m82

    Ignorance Of Russian War Annoys Me

    It's a comedy set in Serbia and it's trying to be about Moscow and Russian gangsters and it's incredibly unrealistic and cliché but it does have some originality and a nice message at the end.

    However apart from Oleg Taktarov's great cameo (one of the few genuine standouts) there is few other actors playing Russians. This doesn't work for the accents. It's far-fetched and completely unrealistic.

    There are very fast edit scenes where Bert is one place then another in an easier location to knock-out a bad guy.

    Plot-wise it is very thin. A lady loses her father's watch so kidnaps Bert's daughter and takes him on a joy-ride to get the watch.

    Soon the twists and turns of an unpredictable and stupid plotline come forth. It's another low-budget action flick on Netflix when I could have watched something better instead. Dull.

    It's also highly-ignorant of the war and Russia's aggression right now and something could have been included in the screenplay. Or better yet it could have been Serbian gangsters then it would have been more honest!
    6LetsReviewThat26

    He is the machine

    I don't know much about bert kreisher as a stand up comedian and this seems to be the first film he has stared in. This film is fun and funny at times but its not by burt that makes it funny. Its the scary russian characters that are including mark hamil who can only sound like the joker in my head. In this movie burt and his father are kidnapped by an attractive woman named irina. She wants a watch returned to her that was a family hairloom and she believes burt took it. Back in college he was known as the machine and became involed in the russian mob. Its hard to believe this film is actually based on a true story. But anyway acting was good and this film is decent enough as a crime action movie cut out the sort of comedy and its a pefectly fine film still.

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    Storyline

    Edit

    Did you know

    Edit
    • Trivia
      Bert's real life wife LeeAnn Kreischer can be seen near the start of the film, as the mom at the Sweet 16 party who Bert does not get along with.
    • Goofs
      After getting shot twice in the chest, Irina falls off the train, only to get reunited with Bert in Igor's village. She also has a piece of wood through her leg that Bert proceeds to extract. However, she seems to have no problem walking or even fighting when she next meets her brother Alexei.
    • Quotes

      Bert: Oh my God I'm inside him. He's so warm.

    • Crazy credits
      While the closing credits roll, a commercial plays starring Bert and his father for Kreischer Karpets.
    • Connections
      Referenced in Brad Tries Podcasting: Fast X/Kandahar/Martyrs (2023)
    • Soundtracks
      Torn
      Written by Scott Cutler, Anne Preven and Phil Thornalley

      Performed by Scott Stapp

      Scott Stapp appears courtesy of Napalm Records

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    FAQ

    • How long is The Machine?Powered by Alexa

    Details

    Edit
    • Release date
      • May 26, 2023 (United States)
    • Countries of origin
      • United States
      • Serbia
    • Language
      • English
    • Also known as
      • Cỗ Máy
    • Filming locations
      • Belgrade, Serbia
    • Production companies
      • Screen Gems
      • Shaken Not Stirred
      • Balkanic Media
    • See more company credits at IMDbPro

    Box office

    Edit
    • Budget
      • $20,000,000 (estimated)
    • Gross US & Canada
      • $10,458,331
    • Opening weekend US & Canada
      • $5,000,545
      • May 28, 2023
    • Gross worldwide
      • $10,664,328
    See detailed box office info on IMDbPro

    Tech specs

    Edit
    • Runtime
      1 hour 52 minutes
    • Color
      • Color
    • Sound mix
      • Dolby Atmos
    • Aspect ratio
      • 2.35 : 1

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