- Ricky Stanicky (Rod Rimestead): Thanks for coming out tonight, ladies and gentlemen. So horny to be here.
- Wes: Do you realize that Rod had a fake life and he made it real? You had a real life and you made it fake.
- JT: Where did you learn to circumcise?
- Ricky Stanicky (Rod Rimestead): Oh, had a job peeling shrimp at Beefsteak Charlie's.
- Ricky Stanicky (Rod Rimestead): Your old man was basting my rump roast, and some of it dribbled into my wooly burger, you know what that makes you? A shit baby. You're nothing but shit and you always will be.