Conjuring: The Beyond

I was at no point...scared during this movie. My wife and I couldn't decide on a movie to watch, and it was getting late, so we just agreed to watch this piece of garbage. We even drank alcohol during the movie...didn't help. That's a bad sign. The acting was bad. The story was bad. Who would agree to be paid 200 dollars to be experimented on, with a side effect of sleep paralysis?! NO ONE! The doctor's mumbo-jumbo about sleep paralysis was enough to put anyone to sleep! The movie got a surprising low 2.3! I guessed 3.9. My wife guessed 4.2. Wow. We were both overshooting this complete waste of time. I hope to GOD they didn't spend a lot of money on this piece of S***! If you see this for rent...and you will, it cost us on YouTube $5.65. Please...there is so much you can spend your money on with that...buy a burger...donate to a homeless shelter...ANYTHING! Just wait for this rubbish to be free before you watch and HATE yourself for viewing it. Peace.

So I'm 30 minutes into the movie and besides the terribly boring and bad 10 minute intro discussion between some girl and someone you assume to be a family member, maybe a father? I don't know, it wasn't explained and wasn't clear. But nothing has happened so far.

I gave it another 10 minutes and still nothing interesting has happened. It's all just been talking about the sleep study they're supposed to be doing, but literally NOTHING has happened. Just people sitting around talking to each other. Insanely slow and I have to wonder if the positive reviews are confusing this movie with a different Conjuring movie since there are multiple, but this is not affiliated with that movie.

I can't keep going... it's just so incredibly boring. If nothing happens in the first 40 minutes of your film, you're doing something wrong. Save yourself an hour and a half and pick a different movie.

Granted, I wasn't really harboring much of any expectations to this 2022 horror movie titled "Conjuring: The Beyond" from writer and director Calvin Morie McCarthy. Why? Well, it just seemed like it was a dubious horror movie cashing in on the success of "The Conjuring" franchise.

But still, I opted to watch "Conjuring: The Beyond" on the account of it being a horror movie that I hadn't already seen. And I should have taken heed of the low rating that the movie had bagged here on IMDb, as it was a very clear indicator of what to expect.

Well, the storyline told in "Conjuring: The Beyond" was adequate enough, however the narrative was just too mundane, slow-paced and uneventful. I mean, you have to go 43 minutes into the movie before anything of even the slightest interest starts to happen, and by then it was just too little, too late. So yeah, don't get your hopes up for "Conjuring: The Beyond", because this was not a gem in the horror cinema.

The acting performances in "Conjuring: The Beyond" were somewhat fair enough, taking into consideration that the actors and actresses had very little to work with in terms of a properly written script, or even an interesting storyline.

Visually then you're not in for a grand cinematic experience, should you opt to sit down and watch "Conjuring: The Beyond". It was okay enough for a movie of this caliber and magnitude, I guess. But this wasn't something that impressed me.

I gave up on the movie with just 53 minutes into the ordeal. By then I just couldn't take any more of this slow-paced nonsense. "Conjuring: The Beyond" failed to entertain me, and this is not a movie that I will ever return to attempt finish watching. Nor is it a movie that I would recommend horror fans to waste their time, money or effort on. Some of us suffered through this in greater or smaller length, so you don't have to.

My rating of "Conjuring: The Beyond" lands on a generous three out of ten stars.

These people stole the name Conjuring just to get eye balls on this piece of garbage film. It is the slowest, most poorly acted, piece of garbage ever to be put out as a movie. I am a huge horror fan and can put up with a ton of garbage but this is utter trash. I get it. You have no idea what you're doing so just steal a name and go for it. At least try. I can't fathom how anyone in this movie called their family and said "I'm doing it!" or "I landed a part in an actual movie". For their follow up might I recommend "The Amityville Conjuring, a Child at Play on Elm Street on a Sinister Friday the 13th....... Ouija!!

Wow - just - wow ! (And I'm not saying that in a good way / or positive way )

The only thing that was scary or horrendous- was just EVERYTHING- and I say that - to warn all of you :

Do not waste your time with this poor excuse of a movie.

Do not waste your money with this garbage excuse of a movie.

I cannot even comment on the acting in this -because I think i could have walked outside- and waved a five dollar bill- and found anyone to "act out any scene with the results being " Oscar worthy " compared to the stiff horribleness " that I sat through as I tried to find any good positive thing to say about this.

A 4 year old with an iPhone could have given us better footage and a better story experience.