Justin Theroux: Rory

Beetlejuice Beetlejuice

Rory

Delia Deetz: So it's settled. Will bring Charles home to Winter River. But I've never hosted a funeral... I've never hosted anything without Charles standing there. Watching me. In awe.
[Lydia tries calling Astrid but gets a voicemail]
Lydia Deetz: She won't pick up.
Rory: Maybe I should tell Astrid about Charles. Might be easier coming from a non-feminine masculine archetype.
Delia Deetz: Well, there aren't any men left in the family.
Rory: Well, no offense taken, Delia. I'll be a member of the family soon enough. In fact, I might be the perfect person to tell her. Having just lost my own grandfather.
Delia Deetz: You did? When?
Rory: Forty years ago. But in my child body, that's yesterday.
Lydia Deetz: I'm gonna tell Astrid, okay? Just give me a few minutes before you come up.
Delia Deetz: Enough! I'll handle this.
[Gets out of the car and starts yelling]
Delia Deetz: Astrid! Astrid! Astrid!
[Astrid goes to the window]
Delia Deetz: Stop torturing your mother. I know I usually find it funny, and only fair after the way she treated me when she was your age. But not today! Your mummy's lost her daddy. You've lost your grandpa. And I've lost my... horny handyman. Charles. Charles! Oh, Charles!

Rory: [after Beetlejuice crashed the wedding, confused] Lydia, what's going on here?
[Lydia goes speechless trying to explain]
Beetlejuice: [throws the handbook down, knowingly] Wow. Awkward.
[he goes up to Rory]
Beetlejuice: You haven't made much progress since our last session, so I'm going to suggest some drug therapy.
[he injects Truth Serum in Rory's neck with a syringe, Rory groans from it]
Beetlejuice: Don't be afraid to share. When you're ready.
[Rory turns to Lydia taking deep breaths]
Rory: [in difficulty] I always thought your whole act was bullshit.
[Lydia and Astrid go bewildered]
Rory: I never believed in ghosts, spirits, or any of it!
Lydia Deetz: What? All this time? Why the hell did you want to get married?
Rory: MONEY!
[all the guests and Lydia go shocked, Astrid seems amused by this]
Rory: [still in difficulty] I knew I could make more as your husband than I could as your manager. Ugh... And I never had a dead fiancée. I just went to that survivor's retreat so that I could meet weak women and exploit them! Uh, and I hit the codependent lottery when I met you!
[Lydia goes furiously insulted]
Beetlejuice: How about a little physical therapy?
[Lydia is given a black and white striped boxing glove, Lydia then angrily punches Rory send him flying across the aisle with everyone watching and recording on their iPhones]