How to Have Sex

I loved the movie.. As a woman who was a teenager once, I (and almost all of us) know these kind of uncomfortable situations whether they're small or more serious.. The movie's done a wonderful job reflecting Tara's emotions, how she felt and why she couldn't do more than she did.. The final may be dissapointing for some, I even wanted more but it's ok.. It's just like real life.. Mostly.. If I'd make a final with a couple of words, I'd say to the young girls&women if I may (which you already know) just say 'no'! Even if you're not sure of what you want, wait till the time you're %100 sure. Wait.. Say no.. Learn how to say 'NO' and overcome your shyness, talk to others, the shame part belongs to the other person, doesn't it?

This impressively naturalistic and quietly devastating exploration of consent focuses on sixteen-year-old Tara as she takes a trip to Malia with her best friends, the envy-prone Skye and the empathetic Em, to celebrate the completion of her exams - and, perhaps, to distract her from the anxiety surrounding her soon-to-be-released grades - by drinking, clubbing and maybe, just maybe, hooking up with some strangers. The trip holds extra importance for her, as she's the last of her friends to still be a virgin and feels the need to rectify this before she returns back home (largely due to societal pressure pushed by her peers - or, rather, one in particular). Strikingly realistic in its every aspect, the picture plays out like an authentic coming-of-age slice of life and keenly cuts to the core of a feeling all too familiar with so many of us, particularly women. While it does generally have a fly-on-the-wall vibe, it also makes use of distinct cinematic techniques to draw you wholly into its hero's headspace. It's an intimate, often incredibly uncomfortable picture that has a lot to say and isn't afraid to say it. It doesn't so much start a conversation as it does make its point and let you chew on it; the ethics surrounding its central issues are pretty black and white, and they aren't intended to be debated so much as communicated. Indeed, 'How To Have Sex (2023)' actually has an implied 'Not' in the title. Whether it reflects someone's own experience and makes them feel seen or challenges someone's behaviour and (hopefully) makes them be better in the future, the film will likely resonate deeply with everyone in its audience. Its power grows the longer you have to sit with it, and its true brilliance is only really evident in retrospect. It's a powerful picture, for sure, arguably because of - not in spite of - its general subtlety. It's essential viewing for, well, pretty much everyone, really.

I was curious about this film as many people seemed angry about the trailer that this seemed to be a female inbetweeners kinda film but went extremely dark, I watched it last night and can't help but feel torn on it.

Whilst it felt really natural almost like a documentary on itv2 the characters were slightly on the harder to like side to start but you warm to them especially Tara, who seems genuinely young and immature.

The two incidents of attacks, were believable and natural rather than an aggressive style you'd see in darker films, it was clever to do it that way, to show that there are levels to it.

Whilst I hate how many people volunteer to get into states where they lack control with alcohol it is part of society, but I'm still amazed when smoking gets so much attention, drinking which causes more crime/damage/death gets little attention.

What ruined it from being an important film was the ending, where a quick chat seemed to undo it's impact on her, personally think it should've ended on a sad note as potentially these incidents are life ruining. So think whilst idea was good, it chickened out of following through.

How to Have Sex (2023) is a long way away from a typical teen romp comedy. Director Molly Manning Walker throws a curveball with this deceptively titled film, instead opting for a raw and unflinching look at female friendship, consent, and the pressures of growing up. Three British teenagers, best friends since childhood, embark on a summer vacation to Greece, fueled by dreams of partying and romantic conquests. However, their idyllic plans take a dark turn, forcing them to confront complex issues that go beyond the awkwardness of teenage flirtation.

Walker, drawing inspiration from her own teenage experiences, paints a relatable portrait of female friendships. The bond between the three leads feels genuine, with their playful banter and unspoken understanding ringing true. Mia McKenna-Bruce shines as Tara, the sensitive and introspective centre of the group. However, the exploration of their dynamic falters slightly at times. The supporting characters, particularly Skye (Lara Peake), can feel one-dimensional, their motivations reduced to teenage posturing and insecurity.

The film's greatest strength lies in its handling of consent. Walker avoids graphic depictions, instead focusing on the emotional fallout and the lingering sense of violation. A pivotal scene at a nightclub is particularly powerful, using slow-motion camerawork and an unsettling soundscape to capture the confusion and fear Tara experiences. This isn't an after-school special; it's a nuanced exploration of consent that persists long after the credits have ended.

Technically, How to Have Sex is a solid effort. The cinematography is naturalistic, with handheld camerawork that reflects the carefree energy of the first half and the claustrophobic tension of the latter. The score is subtle yet effective, using atmospheric sounds and electronic flourishes to underscore the emotional beats. Editing is sharp, keeping the pace brisk without sacrificing character development.

While the film doesn't shy away from difficult themes, it's not relentlessly bleak. There are moments of humour and genuine connection, particularly between Tara and Em (Enva Lewis), the voice of reason in the group. This balance between humour and heartbreak is reminiscent of films like The Virgin Suicides or Booksmart, capturing the bittersweet cocktail of teenage emotions.

How to Have Sex isn't a perfect film. The characters, while well-acted, could be fleshed out further, and the ending feels a tad ambiguous. However, its unflinching portrayal of consent and its exploration of female friendship resonate deeply. This is a coming-of-age story that feels both authentic and important, a must-watch for anyone who remembers the complexities and anxieties of those teenage years. A thought-provoking and emotionally resonant film for mature teens and adults.

It's many decades since I was a teenager, and over 10 years since my own kids navigated that period for themselves, but if this really is representative of what it's like for the current generation (and I guess I have to believe it is, at least somewhat), then it's kind of sad, I think. I wish them well.

As a film, this takes its time to find a balance, IMHO, but the core characters come through pretty well by the end, although personally I found some of them seriously underwritten (e.g. The lesbian couple) and would have preferred them either silent or absent, or given more to do. However, this is a first-time filmmaker, so perhaps that's a bit harsh.

Don't expect a fun time.