The Barn

I picked up a copy of "The Barn" given the movie's cover, and it did seem like it could be an interesting enough horror movie. It definitely had that throwback feel to it, back to the 1980s of horror movies.

And the movie definitely also had that ages feel to it. So that was at least counting in favor of the movie. But it was hardly enough to loom over everything that the movie was failing at.

First and foremost, the storyline in the movie was, and let me just be blatantly honest here, pointless and boring. The movie offered nothing new to the genre, and it felt like it was running on so much auto-pilot that it was derailing itself. Predictable to the core.

The characters in the movie were flaccid and one-dimensional, offering very little flavor to the movie.

As for the acting, well it was adequate enough, taking into consideration the type of movie and its budget size. Just don't go into watching "The Barn" with the hopes of seeing brilliant performances that will blow you away.

The creatures, monsters, call them what you will, in the movie were adequate enough. They weren't scary at all though. But the concept idea of them was interesting enough.

In terms of horror and shock value, then "The Barn" had absolutely zero of that, unless you've never seen a horror movie before in your life. Then, and only then, will you perhaps find some enjoyment in this movie.

I did manage to endure sitting to the very end of the movie, but it wasn't a particular satisfying ending to the movie. It was, in fact, also quite predictable.

On Halloween, 1989, some teens in southwest Pennsylvania make the mistake of entering a forbidden barn, which unleashes three diabolical creatures: a miner boogeyman, a pumpkin man and a scarecrow.

"The Barn" (2016) only cost $80,000 and was a life-long dream project of producer/writer/director Justin M. Seaman. I've seen several such movies by Indie filmmakers shooting in their beloved local areas and you have to understandably brace yourself for the worst, like stilted acting, lousy sound, questionable editing, cheesy effects and unconvincing action sequences. Considering the limited budget, this scores proficiently in all the above with 'B' queen Linnea Quigley showing up for a one-day gig. It's colorful and has a great rockin' soundtrack by no-name artists. The key actors take a relatively serious approach while some of the peripherals ham it up in an amusing way, like Sam's dad.

Where it drops the ball is the writing. There's not enough depth beyond the descriptive blurb above and so I found myself bored with the story and characters in the second half. A similar Indie production, "Angel" (2018), featured stilted acting and lousy action scenes, but it at least had an interesting story (and great cinematography and locations), which made it more rewarding even though "The Barn" is technically superior and delivers the goods for fun Halloween ambiance.

Lexi Dripps (Michelle) and Nikki Howell (Nikki) are serviceable on the feminine front, but more shoulda been done with them. A body double was, incidentally, used for the latter's brief top-nude scene.

It runs 1 hour, 28 minutes, and was shot in various areas of southwest Pennsylvania, including West Alexander (main location), Claysville (street scenes), Washington (roller rink) and Emsworth (Dr. Rock sequence).

GRADE: C+

I get what they were trying to do here. It's the same kind of retro nostalgia that actually works in Stranger Things. Clever marketing and a good cover, but the film doesn't quite stand up to the hype. A good effort which needed a bigger budget.

So the movie is pretty cheesy and campy, but that was also clearly the intent. I thought it was hilarious.

It's cheesetastic.

The kills are hilarious. The plot is pretty silly.

So basically a wonderful snowy Sunday afternoon " horror " flick.