Welcome to the most mystifying vertical disaster since someone said, "Let's make 53 reels of romantic confusion, add adult toys, and make the witch hot-glue the plot together."
Let's start with the "plot," if we can call it that. A random forehead boop from a wandering witch gives Hailey - who looks like she's packing Lunchables for four kids, not interning at a startup - the gift of hearing her boss's thoughts. But ONLY when they touch, because of course physical contact is necessary for maximum awkwardness.
Instead of using her new power for good (or literally anything productive), Hailey mostly uses it to get mad at the thoughts she chose to listen to - and responds by physically assaulting her boss. Repeatedly. I'm sorry, is this supposed to be romantic tension? Because it felt more like a lawsuit waiting to happen.
We've got all your favorite tropes...Magical forehead touching, assault-as-flirting, Clothes recycled from other verticals, Fainting, more fainting, and a fainting finale, And now... wait for it... A MARRIAGE PROPOSAL after one day and half a personality.
The witch? The only one who made a good choice by YEETING the powers halfway through. Iconic. We support her.
And let's not pretend the intimate scene wasn't designed by someone who typed "sexy" into Temu and then ordered everything that came up. The props were... well, let's just say Moira had to clutch a pillow and scream into it - and not in a good way.
And just when you think it's over, the witch reappears with all the urgency of a grocery store clerk asking if you found everything okay. She offers no help, no closure, and no return policy on the terrible decisions made. Thank you for your service, ma'am.
Final notes?
This movie is what happens when an AI bot gets drunk on plot clichés, dares itself to write a romance, and somehow finds three actors willing to touch each other for views. The only thing I can hear now is my own soul trying to escape.
