Salma Hayek: Kitty Softpaws

Puss in Boots: The Last Wish

Kitty Softpaws

Kitty Softpaws: [looks in the sky] I hate to say it... but should we make a wish?
Puss in Boots: Kitty, one life spent with you is all I could ever wish for.

Perrito: Okay, Kitty, I think I've got it now.
[tries to do cute eyes, but starts bulging his eye]
Perrito: Trust me!
Kitty Softpaws: Easy, easy. You're gonna give yourself a hernia. Here, one more time. Like this.
[shows cute eyes]
Kitty Softpaws: Trust me.
Perrito: Aw. But of course I trust you and Puss, even without the eyes.

Kitty Softpaws: You know, when you said Death was after you, I thought you were just being melodramatic.

Puss in Boots: Without my nine lives, I'm not... I'm not...
Kitty Softpaws: What, "The Legend"? I knew I couldn't compete with your true love.
[Throws the map at him]
Kitty Softpaws: Here, get your lives back. Just keep them away from mine.
Puss in Boots: Kitty! Death is after me!

Perrito: I'm supposed to be a fearless hero; a legend, but without lives to spare, I am... nothing. I need that wish to get my lives back.
Perrito: You should tell Kitty. She would understan...
Puss in Boots: No, no, no, no. She cannot hear of this.
Perrito: [confused] Okay?
Kitty Softpaws: [grunts in anger] ¿Adónde fueron ese idiota y su perro?
Puss in Boots: Kitty will never trust me again; not after Santa Coloma.
Perrito: But that's just one bad heist.
Puss in Boots: Santa Coloma wasn't a heist, Perrito. It was a church, with a priest, and guests... and Kitty. Everything but me. I ran away, then, too.
Perrito: Oh...
[begins to understand]
Perrito: Oh.
[gasps in realization]
Perrito: OH!
[whispers]
Perrito: You left her at the altar?
Puss in Boots: It was wrong, I know. I am ashamed. I just wish I hadn't hurt her so badly. I regret that day.
Perrito: So... maybe you should tell that to Kitty. Might make her feel better. Might make you feel better, too.
Kitty Softpaws: [calling out] Puss? Dog? Oh, there you are.

[Puss is at the Wishing Star, preparing to make his wish]
Puss in Boots: Star light, star bright, first star I see tonight. I wish...
Kitty Softpaws: I can't believe I fell for it again.
Puss in Boots: Kitty, you don't understand.
Kitty Softpaws: Don't understand what? That you've been playing me this whole time?
Puss in Boots: I need this wish.
Kitty Softpaws: Oh, yeah? You wanna know what *my* wish was? Someone, *anyone* I could trust.
[Kitty swipes the map from Puss and points her Gatito Blade at him]
Puss in Boots: Hey!
Kitty Softpaws: In my whole life, I've never had that, but I thought I finally found that someone, without a wish. I thought it was you, but you're still running, still the same old Puss in Boots.
Puss in Boots: But I am not, I am not Puss in Boots. I am.. I am on my last life. I need to get my lives back. Without them, I am not... I am *not*...
Kitty Softpaws: What? The legend?
[chuckles sadly]
Kitty Softpaws: I still can't compete with your one true love. Go on. Get your lives back.
[Puss gasps as he grabs the map]
Kitty Softpaws: Just keep them out of mine.
Perrito: [whimpers]
Puss in Boots: kitty! Death Is After Me!
Kitty Softpaws: [confused] What?
Jack Horner: I've been called a lot of things... but never Death. I like it. That's *my* wish!
Mama Bear: Oi! That's Goldi's wish!
[Goldi, Papa Bear and Baby Bear arrive at the Star, as the final battle initiates]

Kitty Softpaws: Why are you so ridiculous, dog? What's your story?
Perrito: My story? Oh, it's actually a very funny story.
[laughs]
Perrito: Back when I was a pup, me and my litter mates lived with a family. A family full of pranksters who liked to play hide-and-seek, and I was always "it". Pick on the little guy, am I right?
Perrito: They tried putting me in a packing crate, a dumpster. No matter how hard they tried, I'd always find them. So one day, they get creative and they put me in a sock with a rock in it.
[laughs]
Perrito: And then throw me in a river!
[falls over laughing]
Perrito: I gnawed a hole in the sock and I swam to the surface.
[Puss and Kitty look horrified]
Perrito: Never found them or my litter mates, so I guess I'm still "it"!
[laughs]
Kitty Softpaws: Wow, that is the saddest funny story I've ever heard.

Kitty Softpaws: You know what trust gets you? A sock, a rock and a swim in the river.
Perrito: You have to trust somebody, right?
Kitty Softpaws: Not me. Uh-uh. Whenever I've let my guard down, I've been double-crossed, declawed, played and betrayed. Never again. I am a solo act. I keep my secrets and I play my cards close. That's how you get a winning hand. Take it from me; never trust anyone.

Kitty Softpaws: What's your name?
Perrito: Oh, I've been called all kinds of things. Dog. Bad Dog. Stupid Dog. Hey You! You There! Get Out! Leave It! Drop It! Big Rat. Small Pig. Rat Face. Butt Nugget.
[beep]
Perrito: For Brains. You know, that sort of thing.