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LavaLampGlobules

Joined Nov 2020
Welcome to the new profile
Our updates are still in development. While the previous version of the profile is no longer accessible, we're actively working on improvements, and some of the missing features will be returning soon! Stay tuned for their return. In the meantime, the Ratings Analysis is still available on our iOS and Android apps, found on the profile page. To view your Rating Distribution(s) by Year and Genre, please refer to our new Help guide.

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LavaLampGlobules's rating
Gladiator II

Gladiator II

6.5
4
  • Apr 26, 2025
  • Aimless Derivative

    Gladiator did not need a sequel, yet here we are.

    All this production effort could have gone into making a top tier 21st century sword and sandals epic that stood on its own two feet rather than in a shadow. Unfortunately Gladiator 2 was not clever enough to get out from that shadow.

    After what Disney did to Star Wars I no longer have patience for reboots or derivative works trying to masquerade as their own thing. G2 wasted no time in creating an urge to simply watch the original instead. It did not do much of anything to try and differentiate itself from its inspiration. That is the problem with movies like this. They are too timid to blaze their own trail.

    If you love Gladiator and have fond memories of it, then save yourself the heartbreak and skip this. Go play Domina instead, it's a fun game.
    The Hangman

    The Hangman

    3.3
    4
  • Sep 29, 2024
  • Bust out the pop corn, it's good for that at least.

    Island Escape

    Island Escape

    3.4
    3
  • Aug 31, 2024
  • Feels like 90s sci fi channel cheese.

    The intro paying homage to Predator was fine, I suppose. That's likely to be my main takeaway from this. The characters are portrayed reasonably well despite most of them being predictable tropes. Their tactical choices as elite mercenaries were dubious at best, which made it hard to root for them. That's not on those actors it's on whoever set up the progression of the scenes. I'm not some military armchair commander and nor do I care to be. All I know is I remember being more coordinated with my friends playing capture the flag as kids in the woods.

    VFX didn't have too much to do here. As for effectiveness, it was almost there. The VFX on the adversaries was a bucket of fake blood poured over them with their eyes whited out. Then shot in the shadows to conceal it. Plus whatever digital modification was done, if any. It didn't really land for me. The aggro zombie growling into the camera came across as comical to me, and it was done far too often. Overall it was not frightening. It seems like something that could work on paper but in the moment it didn't get me.

    While the monsters weren't truly pulling me out of the moment, the music absolutely was. The sfx and music were at odds with each other rather than complimentary. There would be several scenes with captions such as "bushes rustling" or some variation, but the music was so overpowering that I heard nothing else.

    In the beginning the music was OK for the 'lets get the gang together' scenes. After that it didn't fit. During the stalking scenes a drone sound was typically used. Which usually progressed into stock action movie ambience. It was mixed poorly and often sounded like all my mids and highs turned off and then my lows cranked to 10. It didn't make me feel spooked. It had me wondering if I should pause the film to check my EQ.

    Ultimately I don't feel like watching it was bothersome, but it did come close. I wouldn't watch this again, but once was fine. It vibes like a tv movie on the sci-fi channel in the 90s that you'd stop on mostly to cease channel flipping.
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