leigh-00745

Where to even start? Admittedly I'm not a JLo fan, but I wasn't rooting against her either, or at least I wasn't until seeing this. I was in awe, in the worst possible way. I cannot fathom the level of ego and cognitive dissonance required to believe that not only was the world waiting with baited breath to see a feature film that details your love life, but that it's wise to spend 20 million of your own dollars producing it. I don't begrudge her her success in life or in work, but her self-obsession is unreal. This movie is what happens when a woman who never hears "NO", has money to burn, and has every whim catered to runs amok. What happened to humility? And yes, I know the 1% are free to spend their money however they like, but instead of using 20 million dollars to, I don't know, build tens of thousands of wells to provide drinking water, or sending hundreds kids through college, or honestly literally ANYTHING else, you use it to give the world the most insane vanity project they never asked for. Ick. She's officially the w.

I might (read: probably am) naive, but can we collectively at least try to evolve beyond the relentless criticism of female bodies and faces? It's exhausting. Not that it matters, but I think she's actually done less to herself the last couple of years. Even if I'm wrong, a) who gives a kit, and b, c, d & e) she's still really, really good at what she does, including what she does here. For the 9/10 of you that say you "can't get past her face/ lips/ whatever", honestly, just can it already. And while I'm at it, I don't care how old you think she looks compared to her husband either. I'd hazard to guess that none of you are handwringing over the May-December relationships that exist in the 99,530 other films when it's a man who's senior, so check your sexism already.

Is the pacing sitcom-speed pacing? No. Is it even "Succession"-speed pacing? Again, no. It's a slow burn, so know that going in, but it's also a compelling storyline, as "worst nightmare" scenarios often are. I'm into it.